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Hamburger... The Motion Picture

Hamburger... The Motion Picture (1986)

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Review

Where do you go if your dream job is to run a burger joint? That would be Hamburger U., which is what Hamburger… The Motion Picture (1986) is also known as. An ivory tower of grease, girls, and good times, Leigh McCloskey stars as Russell Proco, a rich kid who keeps getting kicked out of colleges because the coeds can't control their lady urges around him. He's got tons of money in a trust fund, but can only get it once he graduates from college. Any college. Since the big burger chain, Busterburger, has a college for franchisees, he figures he'll go to burger school, hang out, squeeze some buns, and get the easiest college degree this side of Arizona State. But Busterburger it's a nightmare school, with the hardass teacher Drootin (Dick Butkus) running his classes with an iron fist, and even banning students from leaving campus, drinking, and busting nuts in each other! Hellbent on failing our leading fella, it's up to Russell to take on Drootin with the help of his zany classmates. Will he get that degree and the cash that comes with it, or will he be stuck flipping burgers, for real? The sex comedy is overstuffed with meaty buns and more variations on the "eating out" joke than you'd think could fit in a feature. But there's plenty of stuff to beat your meat to! There's an orgasmic restaurant scene featuring the big-boobed, squared-jawed, blonde comic ditz Randi Brooks that will make Harry leave Sally! We'll even see her hooters a bit later when she rails a dude in a van. Now that's the In-n-Out Mr. Skin craves! This is where you'll find the nude debut of Karen Mayo-Chandler, a drive-in diva who went on to show off her brunette beauty in such skin-friendly films as Stripped to Kill II: Live Girls (1989). Here, she's straddling a dude and showing him her perfect pair! We'd sure like some between the thighs, with that! And if you like your patties spicy, take a taste of Latina lover Maria Richwine in her first and breast exposure onscreen as she rubs her jugs all over our leading man. That'll tickle your pickle! You'll be adding your special sauce to Hamburger...The Motion Picture!