The Lighthouse (2019)

Robert Eggers, the man who brought us The Witch (2016) is back with another terrifying vision set in a bygone era, The Lighthouse (2019)! Set on a remote New England island in the late 19th century, the black and white film stars Willem Dafoe and Robert Pattinson as Thomas Wake and Thomas Howard, two men tending the island's lighthouse. Wake's last partner went insane, and Howard quickly comes to sort of hate him for always giving him the crap jobs around the lighthouse. As Dafoe drinks himself into oblivion and bothers his bunkmate with his almost non-stop flatulence, Pattinson begins experiencing horrifying visions potentially related to his murdering of a seagull. Eventually, a storm rolls in and strands them, and in that isolation madness overtakes them both. As the two investigate each other, it becomes less and less clear if Wake's former partner was the crazy one after all. Or that his death went down the way Dafoe is claiming. In this incredibly odd flick based on a true story where a lighthouse keeper's partner died, but he kept the body around in fear the cops would accuse him of murder, Pattinson's sexiest vision involve a mermaid (Valeriia Karaman), who washes up on shore! Examining her body, Pattinson removes the seaweed from it, exposing her left breast, which we also again later in close-up during another vision! Pattinson uses the look at those under the sea suck sacks to bust a nut a bit later, and we can't blame him. Life in the lighthouse is boring, and Karaman's cans do things to a man. We wish The Lighthouse wasn't so light on nudity, but we'll take those tatas any day! Those mermaid mams are the real light guiding you through the storm in The Lighthouse!