Crew Cut (1979)

Tortured young artists are by definition a self-absorbed lot, so if you can't stand the sight of a guy wallowing in self-pity, you're going to have to fast-forward through the Dutch drama Crew Cut (1979). Derek de Lint stars as Erik, a 29-year-old who takes a job painting lampshades during the Second World War, and who longs for two things in his life: creative and sexual fulfillment. No one but Erik can help him with the first one, but the second comes courtesy of his girlfriend Elly (Tingue Dongelmans), who bares her melons, mud flaps and massive '70s muff on the floor of Erik's studio. She certainly doesn't have a Crew Cut...