Con Express (2002)

The Cold War has gotten hot in Con Express (2002). With Russia and the U.S. now on friendly terms, it's time for their spies to start getting a bit cozier, too. After a rogue Russian with a bundle of nerve gas escapes authorities, an American agent teams up with a Russian Mata Hari to capture him. They're hot on the bad guy's trail when Ursula Karven's hot tail spooks her red, white, and blue comrade into going deep under the covers with her. This can express is going full steam ahead into the hot territory. Her delectable chesticles first appear at the 45-minute mark when she removes her shirt and hands it up. We get a 10-second view of the titties until she covers up with a blanket. A few minutes later she drops her blanket and shows off her birthday suit. It's scorching hot but we unfortunately don't get a good look at the bush or butt. The consensus among most cinephiles is that this flick is far better than it has any right to be. Particularly due to the strong performance from actor Arnold Vosloo and the epic train sequences. The villains also put on a good show and were more than simply faceless assholes getting in the way of the good guy accomplishing his goal. Some have said that the nudity takes the viewer out of the story, but Mr. Skin couldn't disagree more! It simply enriches the story with some much-needed masturbation fuel for the flesh fiends in the audience. Shouldn't every action flick cater to our demographic?