Chickboxer (1992)

The curatorial geniuses behind the Bad Movie Police line of video reissues find a whole barrelful of fish worth shooting in Scott P. Plummer’s B-film fiasco Chickboxer (1992). Julie Suscinski stars as Kathy, a woefully out of shape couch potato whose misfortunes are compounded by the fact that she has trouble distinguishing fantasy from reality. Obsessed with the antics of a buxom TV superhero (the titular Chickboxer, played by Michelle Bauer), Kathy signs up for martial arts lessons at a dojo that happens to be a front for criminal activity. Things devolve quickly as Kathy finds herself in the middle of a drug ring and kidnapping plot, with the real-life Chickboxer her only hope of salvation. Fortunately for everyone, plot contrivances and hideous acting aren’t incompatible with footage of Bauer’s bouncing melons.