A mild-mannered science teacher has a bloodthirsty secret in Vampire (2011). As you probably inferred from the title, Simon (Kevin Zegers) is indeed an undead creature who depends on freshly harvested human blood to survive. But unlike most vampires, Simon's methods are (relatively) humane: he finds depressed young women online, makes suicide pacts with them, and when the time comes simply fails to live up to his end of the bargain. But his friend Renfield (Trevor Morgan)'s methods are not so gentle, as we see when he asphyxiates a topless Jodi Balfour 41 minutes in. Bummer--but we'd still pound our stakes into that any time.