Mysterious gunslinger Clive Owen is minding his own business when he sees a pregnant woman chased by a pack of wackos in Shoot 'Em Up (2007), the tale of one trigger-happy tough guy's attempt to unravel a plot to hurt the lady's tot. When the woman dies, Clive delivers the baby and then takes it into his care; while trying to figure out why the toughs wanted her snuffed, he discovers that they were actually after the kid. His usual crowd is of the slightly sleazy sort, so he doesn't know who to turn to for advice on how to take care of the little critter. Luckily for him (and for us), he does have one lady friend, and she looks just like Monica Bellucci. In fact, she is Monica Bellucci! She's also a lactating lady of the night who caters to guys with a mommy fetish, so the infant is one lucky little bugger. But can Clive and Monica save the baby from Paul Giamatti and his bastard puppetmasters?