Beowulf (2007)

British Lit students will be happy to see that the Old English epic poem that’s hard to read has been made into the big screen saga Beowulf (2007). Not to be confused with the science fiction flick Beowulf (1999) starring Christopher Lambert, this Robert Zemeckis pic has Ray Winstone playing the title character. He’s a  Geatish warrior who is out to save the Danes in the year 507. They’re being threatened by a mean old monster named Grendel (Crispin Glover) who seems nigh-on invincible. As Beowulf travels to Denmark, the story introduces us to King Hrothgar (Anthony Hopkins) and Queen Wealtheow (Robin Wright Penn), the king’s advisor Unferth (John Malkovich), Beowulf's lieutenant Wiglaf (Brendan Gleeson), Finn of Frisia (Fredrik Hiller), Estrith (Charlotte Salt), Yrsa (Leslie Harter Zemeckis), and Beowulf's concubine Ursula (Alison Lohman). No doubt, she’s worth a wolf whistle or two! As you can guess, a lot of twists and turns ensue as magical deals are done via some secret nookie. Eventually, Beowulf reaches his fate. And, after a ferocious battle, he manages to get rid of that grumpy, gruesome Grendel for good. Alas Grendel’s mother (Angelina Jolie) isn’t going to take her son’s demise lightly. As such, she sets out to wreak revenge — getting a whole lot of naked in the process. Unfortunately, Beowulf is a motion-capture film, so there’s not that much of Ms. Jolie to see. In other words, her T&A might be CGI. Nevertheless, Angie’s supposed full frontal nudity is one hell of a special effect!