300 (2006)

On a scale from 1 to 100, Mr. Skin rates female nudity at 300 (2006). Luckily for us, the cinmeatic epic of the same ranking delivers its fair share of nearly-naked Perfect 10s. Based on Frank Miller and Lynn Varley’s same-named comic book series from 1998, this action flick takes artistic liberties as it retells the Battle of Thermopylae during the Greco-Persian Wars. That’s right, the R-rated pic mixes fictionalized history with real-life hotties! In 480 B.C., King Leonidas (Gerard Butler) leads Sparta’s buffest brutes in combat against the armies of King Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro). True, there are a lot of semi-dressed men in this movie, including Captain Artemis (Vincent Regan); the spirited Spartan soldier Stelios (Michael Fassbender); the corrupt politician Theron (Dominic West); and the deranged Immortal (Robert Maillet). But what prevents the film from becoming a total sausage-fest are the appearances by alluring actresses via a freaky, kinky all-girl orgy! Did we mention Pythia (Kelly Craig)? As an Oracle to the Ephors, this trippy chick knows how to get into our heads by shedding her threads and baring her chest! When she gyrates around, her tiny left ta-ta and high-water booty pop out of her diaphanous dress to get some air. If that’s not arousing enough, the Queen of Sparta (Lena Headey) treats us to a royal view of her nude hoots when she’s in bed with a dude. We’re guessing that as you waited for 300: Rise of an Empire (2014), this ravishing regal had you polishing your scepter!