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The Baytown Outlaws

The Baytown Outlaws (2012)

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Nostalgic for the days of Smokey and the Bandit (1977)-style redneck car chase wreckstravaganzas? Don't be, because this favorite '70s genre is back and as explosive as ever in The Baytown Outlaws (2012). Brick (Clayne Crawford), Lincoln (Daniel Cudmore), and McQueen (Travis Fimmel) are a trio of Alabama bad boys who spend their free time slaughtering criminals to keep the crime rate in their Sheriff daddy's jurisdiction incredibly low. Celeste (Eva Longoria) has good reason to send our three outlaw bounty hunters after her no-good ex-husband Carlos (Billy Bob Thornton)--he shot her three times in the gut, after all. But before they can rescue her godson Rob (Thomas Brodie-Sangster) from Carlos' clutches, our redneck reconnaissance team is going to have to battle some truly ferocious fighters. See, it ends up there's all sorts of inheritance money involved, so while Celeste hired her own gang of contract killers, Carlos sprung for some higher end hitmen to take out our good ole boys before they can come for him. From Bama to Texas, the three are going to run into all sorts of wild gangs looking to kill them. Among these assassins are the amazing assed Agnes Bruckner, Serinda Swan, Brea Grant and Arden Cho, who all encompass a band of sexy but badass biker chicks who seduce our Southerners before trying to take them out. They all look amazing riding their motorcycles in lingerie, but only their compatriot Zoe Bell bares her butt. That's not fair! Even John Wick can't shoot straight with all that blood rushing to his dick! We also get to see Eva in some Daisy Dukes as she tries to hire the fellas. Women like that will turn Baytown into spraytown!