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Who says comedians are sad, lonely people? Well, everyone. And for the most part they're right. But Greg Fitzsimmons is the exception that proves the rule. The two-time Emmy Award winner for his writing and producing on The Ellen Degeneres Show is married to a beautiful woman, with whom he has a child, proving that he's getting some.

The comic is also riding high professionally, writing for the sitcom Lucky Louie, which premiers on HBO in June, negotiating with ABC to develop his own show, and appearing on the tube weekly for VH1's Best Week Ever. Catch his hilarious half-hour special on Comedy Central March 17 and pick up his comedy CD, Fitz of Laughter, if you don't mind a comedy attack sure to send an Amazonian stream of snot and tears down your cheeks.

But here at Mr. Skin we're concerned with other bodily fluids, with which Fitzsimmons is not unfamiliar. He did, after all, just host the AVN Awards, celebrating the best in breasts (and bums and bush and boners and anal and oral and, well, you get the picture). He's also documented his changing relationship with his penis after his wife's pregnancy on Playboy.com. So it was only a matter of time before this funnyman chewed the fat with Mr. Skin.

That chewed fat is displayed below, as Fitzsimmons talks openly about how he researched his material on porn stars for the AVN gig, which mainstream actresses make him want to chew his fatty (if only he could), and how the changes in a woman's body during pregnancy make him very, very happy. To keep up with all things Fitzsimmons, log onto his website, gregfitzsimmons.com.

You recently hosted the AVN Awards in Las Vegas, more commonly known as the porn awards. What was the dirtiest thing you saw during that gig?
The crotches on the geeky guys who wandered over from the Consumer Electronics Convention. They have their big trade show every year at the same time as the porno awards. Thousands of fat guys wearing knapsacks on both shoulders and snapping photos with their cell phones. Very sexy.

Are there any fringe benefits associated with rubbing elbows (and hopefully other body parts) with porn stars?
Connections, baby! I've got access to any porno shoot in L.A. Also, leading up to the awards, every production company sent me dozens of DVDs. I'm pretty well stocked for the next decade (or until Pauly Shore comes over).

How will your upcoming special on Comedy Central differ from the material you used at the AVN Awards?
The material I used on the AVN's was mostly written for the show. I went to some porn shoots and got to know the players so I could make fun of them. The Comedy Central special is more about sex with my wife. Both shows premier the same night on March 17.

You're familiar with Mr. Skin, so which actress profile or film review do you go to first when you log on?
Christina Ricci (Picture: 1 - 2) in Prozac Nation. She was severely depressed in that scene. I was not. Thora Birch (Picture: 1 - 2) was also nice.

Do you recall the first nude scene you saw in a mainstream movie?
Animal House. The topless pillow fight and then the sorority girl finger blasting herself while gazing out the window (Picture: 1 - 2).

What's your favorite sex scene in a movie?
My favorite non-porn sex scene is An Officer and a Gentleman. Debra Winger (Picture: 1 - 2) was real sexy and wild. And it looked like Richard Gere had something in his ass.

I know you're married with a child, but could you can fantasize for a moment about your favorite screen sex siren?
It actually is my wife. It's a short film we made with our own money (and camera and film).

Speaking of your wife and child, you wrote for Playboy.com how having a baby changed your relationship with your penis forever. What's it like now?
My penis is back in good hands--mine.

You also wrote about documenting your wife's pregnancy with naked Polaroid pictures taken every three weeks. Is this some kind of a fetish?
It was until I discovered breastfeeding mommies. Now I spend most of my time in playgrounds and preschools with my kids.

Your website has pictures of you with such notables as Jodie Foster, Natalie Merchant, and Janet Reno. Is that your unholy trinity of desire?
I like to think they each have me on their websites as well.

One of your credits is as a consulting producer on The Man Show. Does that mean you got to get jiggy with the Juggies?
Absolutely not! Those women are professionals and the mere insinuation that there would be anything less than scrupulous about them is beyond bad taste. Good day sir!

On to a less controversial topic, you were nominated for a Daytime Emmy for your writing on The Ellen Degeneres Show. Is she a Mr. Skin fan?
No comment.

You appeared in a comedy short called The Gynecologists. What's the story there?
The Gynecologists was a film I did with Pete Corealle, Lewis Black, Judy Gold, Jim Norton, and a bunch of other funny people.

Will you star in Lucky Louie, the HBO sitcom you're working on, and what's it about?
No. I am writing on the show. It is an honest raw look at having a family unlike you normally see on TV. Great cast. Look for it on HBO in June.

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