Against All Odds

You know, we should all put a little money aside and form a fund for Linsey Wagner so that she doesn’t have to appear in hokey garbola like this ever again. I figure it’s fair that we each put in one dollar for every time we jerked off to The Bionic Woman, thus raising millions for Wagner and keeping her in the style to which she should be accustomed. Who’s with me?! Nobody, huh? You cheap bastards. So this flick was a reality show before such things had a name, starring Wagner and B-movie nobody, Everett McGill. It showed stories of real-life heroes and used a combo of video footage, re-creations and interviews with eyewitnesses and family members to teach us all about how much we suck compared to these brave men and women. Hey, I can admit it. I suck. If I was in Return To Paradise with Vince Vaughn andJoaquin Phoenix, I would have chosen to stay home and let Joaquin hang. Sue me. But I digress, Lindsay Wagner showed her taters in 1973’s Two People, with Peter Fonda. If you can find it, send us a copy. We’ve given up hope that the thing even exists anymore.