Die Stoßburg (1973)

As The Simpsons taught us, the word "Die" in German means "The," so thankfully no one is trying to kill Stoßurg in Die Stoßurg (1974), especially since it roughly translates to The Castle. We don't know who lives in the castle or who's attempting to place it under siege or perhaps even kill the castle. Is anyone trying to kill the castle? We're really not sure, and honestly could care less because we've got other interests in this castle, like a fantastically furry full frontal scene from the gorgeous Dagmar Wohrl, who bares her hairy bush and breasts while preparing for her wedding night with discount Sean Connery!