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Joan Severance

Joan Severance Nude

Hall of Fame Nudity!

Keywords: Hall of Fame Nudity!, White, Brunette Hair, Large Breasts, Fake Breasts, Average Body

Nude Roles: 13

Birthplace: Houston, Texas, US

Date of Birth: 12/23/58

13 Blog Posts for this celebrity

Top Joan Severance Scenes

Black Scorpion (1995) Nude, breasts, butt, body double 01:06:00 BODY DOUBLE: Good God almighty, those are some insanely perfect big-nipped knockers and heart-shaped heinie we see as a masked lady hops on some dude's flesh tube. Unfortunately, that body ain't Joan's. Ah well, no harm in pretending. (1 min 9 secs)
Lake Consequence (1993) Nude, breasts 00:02:00 Joan's dude pulls aside the top of her robe to leave her left breasticle exposed. That done, he inexplicably gets up and walks away. What the . . .? (15 secs)
Lake Consequence (1993) Nude, breasts, bush 00:48:00 Holy haircourt! Joan exposes a dense thicket of dark fuzz as she full-frontally enters a hot tub to get it on with Billy Zane. As May gets poked with acupuncture needles, Severance flashes her funbags a few times. (54 secs)
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Biography

Joan Severance is a credit to model-turned-actresses everywhere. Why waste that statuesque, black-haired, high-assed beauty on getting married and raising kids somewhere back in your native Texas? When Joan's big acting break on the 1980s network sensation Wiseguy failed to fire up an A-list career, the extra-stacked Severance promptly took her place at the head of the Bs. Joan began a creative partnership on Showtime's skintillating Red Shoe Diaries, where she was muff-baring muse to mentor Zalman King. King is the crown prince of skinsational erotic thrillers, and his expertise is epitomized in Lake Consequence (1993). Joan shined in an outdoor sex scene. She shined in an indoor sex scene. What, no underwater sex scene? They had a lake right there, for God's sake! If it's any consolation, she did shine wetly in a shower stall lesbian sex scene. Showering has been Joan's skinematic staple; she showered her mini Joans in the Gene Wilder/Richard Pryor comedy See No Evil, Hear No Evil (1989) and in the thrillers Illicit Behavior (1992) and Black Scorpion (1995), but in the latter two cases her breasts are obscured. That's okay: you get to see them at other times in both movies. You also get to see them, along with her butt and bush in certain instances, in Another Pair of Aces (1991), Almost Pregnant (1992), Criminal Passion (1994), Payback (1995), In Dark Places (1997), and Sex & Consequences (2006). Unfortunately, she seems to have retired her magnificent mams. Our severance pay is Joan's 13 nude roles preserved in perpetuity.

Filmography

Sex & Consequences (2006) - as Lisa Wayne

Nude, breasts 01:01:00 Mouthwatering MILF Joan gives us tons of juggies while enticing her younger lover into some bedtime Polaroid fun. (2 mins 35 secs)
Nude, breasts 00:08:00 Lusty legend Joan dispenses with the bra to bust out boobage for sex. We're off to a great start . . . (1 min 10 secs)
Nude, breasts 00:28:00 A few quick shots of Severance snoobs in the mirror when she puts on some clothing. (15 secs)

Cause of Death (2000) - as Angela Carter

The Last Seduction II (1999) - as Bridget Gregory

Black Scorpion II (1997) - as Darcy Walker / Black Scorpion

In Dark Places (1997) - as Chapelle

Profile for Murder (1996) - as Dr. Hanna Carras

Black Scorpion (1995) - as Darcy Walker / Black Scorpion

Nude, breasts, butt, body double 01:06:00 BODY DOUBLE: Good God almighty, those are some insanely perfect big-nipped knockers and heart-shaped heinie we see as a masked lady hops on some dude's flesh tube. Unfortunately, that body ain't Joan's. Ah well, no harm in pretending. (1 min 9 secs)

Payback (1995) - as Rose Gullerman

Nude, breasts, bush 00:51:00 First we get Joan's lovely jugs. Then some bush before C. Thomas Howell actually munches the box! Really! (2 mins 24 secs)
Nude, breasts, butt 00:57:00 Tits, ass and a smidgen of fur as Joan and the chicken-chested C. Thomas Howell enjoy a silly sex scene on top of a Lincoln Continental. (1 min 49 secs)

Criminal Passion (1994) - as Melanie Hudson

Dangerous Indiscretion (1994) - as Caroline Everett

Lake Consequence (1993) - as Irene

Nude, breasts 01:04:00 Joan and May show their spa spooters in a steamy hot tub three-way with pre-cueball Billy Zane. It's a boob-bumpin', tongue-twiddlin' extravaganza! (1 min 27 secs)
Nude, breasts 01:06:00 Boobs during sex outside. (1 min 7 secs)
Nude, breasts 00:02:00 Joan's dude pulls aside the top of her robe to leave her left breasticle exposed. That done, he inexplicably gets up and walks away. What the . . .? (15 secs)
Nude, breasts, bush 00:48:00 Holy haircourt! Joan exposes a dense thicket of dark fuzz as she full-frontally enters a hot tub to get it on with Billy Zane. As May gets poked with acupuncture needles, Severance flashes her funbags a few times. (54 secs)

Almost Pregnant (1992) - as Maureen Mallory

Nude, breasts, thong 01:02:00 A couple flashes of her breasts as she dances around in a little skirt and then her panties. (35 secs)
Nude, breasts, butt 01:09:00 Joan's breasts and buns join Jeff Conway and a can of whipped cream in bed. (40 secs)
Nude, breasts 00:58:00 Joan makes with the jugs after dropping her belly-dancer outfit as Jeff Conway enjoys the show. (45 secs)

Illicit Behavior (1992) - as Melissa Yarnell

Nude, breasts 01:12:51 Joan sleeps topless in bed while Jake Fratelli from The Goonies chats with her, her right breast exposed as they start to make out! (1 min 40 secs)
Nude, breasts, underwear 01:07:01 Joan makes out with Jake Fratelli in the car, her breasts visible once she ditches her bra! (1 min 29 secs)
Nude, butt, sexy, underwear 01:02:56 Joan pulls off her dress while Jake Fratelli spies on her. We see her boobs and buns as she takes off her underwear! (19 secs)
Nude, breasts, underwear 00:53:12 Joan unhooks her bra and we get a voyeuristic look at her breasts! (38 secs)

Another Pair of Aces (1991) - as Susan Davis

Nude, breasts, butt 01:00:54 Joan makes the kissy-kissy in bed with Kris Kristofferson, giving us some good looks at her pair of aces and heart-shaped ass along the way. (1 min 2 secs)

Write to Kill (1991) - as Belle Washburn

Nude, breasts 01:10:44 Joan drops her towel and reveals her tanned torso-torpedoes while Gene Wilder pretends to have a gun in his pocket. (1 min 9 secs)
Nude, breasts, butt 01:09:00 Brief bunnage through the shower door, followed by Joan's great juggles as she leans out while Gene Wilder conducts some funny business. (45 secs)

TV Shows

Wicked Wicked Games (2006-2007) - as Anna Whitman

Red Shoe Diaries (1991-1999) - as The Woman

Just Deserts - as NA

The Love Boat: The Next Wave - as Camille Hunter

Wiseguy - as Susan Profitt

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