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HAPPY ST. PATRICK’S DAY!It’s been an official Christian feast day since the 17th Century on which the restrictions on eating and drinking alcohol during Lent are lifted. Which, according to Wikipedia, “has encouraged and propagated the holiday’s tradition of alcohol consumption.” Leading to removal of articles of clothing …such as by adorable Adrienne Manning above—an Omaha native born Adrienne Meints who became a ‘web celeb’ known as Sweet Adri at age 21 before being selected as the Penthouse Pet for December 2007.
“Ireland has seen some of the sexiest stars in the world emerge from its tiny shores (population just over 6 million),” wrote rival British tabloid The Sun. All over the world today, people will be toasting ‘Erin go bragh’ (Maitland Ward and Bai Ling embody the expression above)—the traditional Gaelic phrase meaning “Ireland Forever.” Particularly when they go bragh•less! Melissa Harrington—a fine Irish name—who fronted the most popular amateur website in the world as Melissa Midwest…and Vicky Vette, the reigning AVN Award winner for Best Solo Girl site join in the celebration (below).
Sleuth will mark the day as only he knows how…but unlike most sites that “take the easy way out” by naming women of “Irish descent”—like Anne Hathaway, Heather Graham and Bridget Moynahan {all born and raised in America}—we will count down the Top 10 “Hot Potatoes” actually born and bred on the Emerald Isle! And show each of them clad—a word originating in Ireland—in green garments…then without those varmints!
10. SINÉAD CUSACK – born in Dalkey, County Dublin, Ireland (1948)
Married to actor Jeremy Irons since 1978, she says: “I was christened Jane. But when I left my Gaelic-speaking Irish school to go to an English convent school, I wanted to retain a little of my Irish ancestry. I want to remain Irish.” Showing her pluck, Sinéad bravely bared her butt at age 48 in the film Stealing Beauty.
9. FIONA SHAW – born in County Cork (1958)
Best known as awful Aunt Petunia Dursley in the Harry Potter films and for her longtime lesbian love affair with actress Saffron Burrows, Fiona bared her mammaries in the aptly named Mountains of the Moon (1990).
8. MAUREEN O’SULLIVAN – born in Boyle, County Roscommon (1911)
Late mother of Mia Farrow—who amazingly tweeted this furry full frontal outtake from 1934’s Tarzan and His Mate on August 26, 2014 with the caption: “My mom was in great shape when she made those Tarzan movies – and that’s before trainers.” And perhaps tweezers…
7. EVANNA LYNCH– born in Termonfeckin, County Louth (1991)
A non-actress fan of Harry Potter who went to an open audition of 15,000 girls at age 14 and won the role of Luna Lovegood, she has “a pussy named Dumbledore.” Clearly she believes in letting her ‘cat’ out for fresh air.
6. MAUREEN O’HARA – born in Ranelagh, County Dublin (1920)
Dying just last October at age 95, Maureen was dubbed ‘The Queen of Technicolor’ for her flaming red hair and bright emerald green eyes—which best “showed off the splendor of the fledging Forties film process.” And a sheer purple blouse best showed off the splendor of O’Hara’s o’pair-a in her “personal favorite” movie, 1952’s The Quiet Man, shot on location in Ireland’s County Mayo with frequent film partner John Wayne.
5. SARAH BOLGER – born in Dublin, Leinster Province (1991)
Making her debut at 12 with younger sister Emma as the children of immigrants in 2003’s In America, she was selected as one of ‘The Faces of Ireland’ for a 2011 photographic exhibition alongside Sinéad O’Connor and Pierce Brosnan. “Ireland’s always going to be my home, but so much is filmed in L.A., you have to spend time out here,” The Tudors star Sarah says in her lilting brogue. Then lets her right nipple go rogue!
4. ANDREA CORR – born in Dundalk, County Louth (1974)
The youngest of the Celtic singing siblings The Corrs—with chart-topping hits like Breathless and Runaway in the late ’90s—she turned actress in Evita, was voted ‘The Most Beautiful Woman in Britain’ and drew raves from FHM: “Andrea Corr is a living Guinness-induced sex hallucination.” Though not so stout {sorry}: “Can I remember what it felt like when my breasts started to grow,” she smiled. “No, I’m still waiting.” Then she assessed her assets: “The shape’s OK, it’s size that I need. Let’s just say that I don’t panic if I haven’t packed a bra when traveling.” And when she traveled to Taormina, Italy on May 5, 2001 it appears she forgot to pack a bikini top two!
3. FIONNULA FLANAGAN – born in Dublin, Leinster Province (1941)
Her first name, pronounced finoola, means “fair shoulders” in Gaelic…but it was what she did below the waist in the 1983 film James Joyce’s Women that had everyone talking as her fingers did the walking (above right)! “I’m Irish and always will be,” the Rich Man, Poor Man actress proudly proclaims. “I think Irish women are strong as horses.” Fetching Fionnula’s a mare that men—rich or poor—would gladly mount!
2. KERRY CONDON – born in Thurles, County Tipperary (1983)
“It’s a long way to Tipperary,” the song goes, but we’d take the trip by ferry for the chance to glimpse Kerry! She confused fanboys with “an utterly random Irish accent” in 2015’s Avengers: Age of Ultron as the voice of virtual personal assistant F.R.I.D.A.Y, but is best remembered as nubile Octavia in the 2005 HBO series Rome, where the reality of her real red hair—including there—was virtually visible! When Irish thighs are ‘smiling’…
1. SAOIRSE RONAN – raised in County Carlow and Howth, County Dublin (1994)
Our top spot is reserved for the two-time Academy Award nominee who’s never done nudity…until we captured this ‘nip tip slip’ from the 2016 ceremony! Ironically, she barely lost out to our #7 selection, Evanna Lynch, for the role of Luna at the Harry Potter audition, but atoned for that in Atonement—becoming one of the youngest Oscar nominees ever at age 12. She may be a bit on the col•lean side for some, but lads are lining up these days for a shot at bonein’ Ronan!!
As usual, Sleuth is Dublin’ down by one-upping the other sites in uncovering the chassis of actual lassies. We know the March 17th holiday is meant to honor the patron saint of Ireland, yet surely the traditional “Wearing of the Green” can be discouraged for a day! So, at the END of the rainbow, let’s butt out where we began (and begorrah!) with faith in our Boy Meets World beauty of Irish descent, Maitland Ward—who, in the words of Perez Hilton, sports “a shamrock tattoo, which is placed…basically on her side vag.” Why not a lip•rechaun?
