So, have we all had time to form our opinions on the sort-of-blockbuster remake of Total Recall? We haven't seen it, but that's because we can't bear to see a good Ah-nold performance bastardized by the likes of Colin Farrell. That, and it looks slick and shiny and...kind of boring.
But one thing that is definitely not boring in Lycia Naff, the original three-breasted woman from the 1990 Total Recall. Lycia has been enjoying more media attention this week than she's seen in two decades, and in an interview with Vulture Lycia reveals nude information about that famous reveal. For example, did you know she was originally supposed to have four funbags?
"They originally were going to give me four breasts, but the feedback was that I looked too bovine, like a cow ready to be milked, and that wasn't sexy," Lycia explains.
What was it like working with Arnold Schwarzenegger? "I remember looking into his eyes and thinking his pupils were so small, so I was like, He looks scary to me. So he creeped me out a bit, but he was very professional, and he didn't flirt and he didn't try to touch the breasts," she says.
"But still, I felt really exposed," she adds. "It didn't hit me until the first moment where the scene called for me to expose myself, because what came over me was such shame. Which was weird, because they weren't my breasts, and it was what I had signed up to doNow, looking back, why not? Why not make a goof of it?"
"I'm curious to see her in the movie," Lycia says about her counterpart in the new Total Recall, Kaitlyn Leeb. "She's stunning and gorgeous and her costume is beautiful, extremely sexy and alluring. But she's got that horizontal strip in the photosI think that would be sexy, propositioning someone with that strip. You could pull it back, and it would be raunchy. I just got a warm tingle in my areole thinking about it."
A tingle of sympathy, maybe? "I can relate to [her] she's had to carry on with all the horny sci-fi fanboys! They're hers now! Chicks and sci-fi go hand in hand."
So what happened to Lycia Naff? After a few scattered TV roles in the early '90s, Lycia became a writer for People Magazine, and in that capacity has the dubious honor of being called a "cunt" by Ms. Wild Things herself, Denise Richards. But in our hard-on of hard-ons, she'll always be the "three-breasted hooker" to us.
