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Megan Mooney can be heard on XM Radio's comedy channel 150, but if you're still living in the analog age, don't worry, there's hope. The funny lady is taking center stage in an older, more popular medium: television. She's also starring in her own Comedy Central special that's currently running on the network. Bring your knee, because there'll be plenty of knee slapping.

Mooney brought her heinie and took a seat to shoot the shit with Mr. Skin recently. The shit was flying and landed on topics as diverse as whose tits are big in Mooney's home state of Texas, why being raised Catholic beat the love of humor into her, and how smart her ass (and vagina) is. You'll have to read on for an explanation of that.

And once you've read what this comic has to say, why not visit her in cyberspace at her website, MeganMooney.com. The revolution will be televised on Comedy Central, but it's digitalized right now.

You're from Texas, so do the laughs come bigger in the Lone Star State?
I wouldn't necessarily say the laughs come bigger in Texas. But you know what does come bigger in Texas? No, readers of Mr. Skin, not tits ... toast. Maybe you've heard of it, Texas Toast. It's prepared by women with huge tits and frosted hair ... and it's delicious.

I read that you started making audiences laugh in fourth grade. Were you the class clown?
I was the class clown. At lunch I would do balloon animals for the other kids. Sometimes I would juggle when my teachers were sad. When I got to high school the carpool was odd, because I had the smallest vehicle and at least fourteen friends to drive. You should have seen us getting out of that Beetle ... fourteen ladies with hilarious hats and face paint. God, I was popular.

As a product of Catholic school, do you have a fetish for nuns or men in collars?
No nun fetishes to report. As for men in collars, yes. But not priest collars or dog collars (sorry, fellas). I go for guys in white collars, attached to Calvin Klein shirts that are underneath Armani suit coats. That's my fetish.

What's in store for viewers tuning in to your Comedy Central special?
Twenty-two minutes of pure funny, and eight minutes of advertising. You're in for quite a ride. I haven't seen the final edit, but there is a small possibility you will hear the term "Donkey Punch." Enough said. Enjoy. And by the way, have fun explaining that one to your kids.

You received the 1998 "Funniest Person in Austin" award. So what's happened since then, has Austin been overrun by funnier people?
In 1999 I completely lost all the funny. It was quite difficult to admit. For months I couldn't get people to laugh. I'd go on stage and immediately people would start to get sad inside. At that time I decided to renounce my title and give it to a juggler who pooped candy.

You like prank calls. Is there one you're most proud of?
The old reliable movie theater prank call--"How long is Harry Potter?" I ask. "Two and a half hours," they reply. "Oh ... I heard nine inches." Click.

The Indianapolis Star describes you as a "sarcastic, smart-ass extraordinaire with a myriad of truly original topics." Just how smart is your ass?
Good question, and one I often answer. My ass was a janitor at MIT and would solve complicated mathematical equations while mopping floors. It wasn't long until my ass was discovered by a professor, who took my ass under his wing and put my ass in therapy with Robin Williams. At first it was hard for my ass to open up. Eventually my ass became so comfortable around Robin Williams, it dropped its guard. Robin and my ass really connected. It was beautiful ... my ass had never known trust before this.

How about your other body parts, are they equally intelligent?
While my ass was in therapy with Robin Williams, my vagina studied abroad. My vagina saw the whole world and came back a classically trained violinist. It was weird. It was almost like I didn't know my vagina anymore. If it wasn't for my love of stand-up comedy, I believe my ass and vagina would have made some great contributions to society by now.

Which starlet profiled on Mr. Skin are you most interested in seeing naked?
If I could see anyone naked, anyone at all, I'd pick Becky Pedigo. She's another comic who you interviewed recently. When I first met Becky, she had the nickname of "The Texas Toaster" because if you messed with her, she'd burn you.

Continuing our bodily theme, do you recall, growing up, the first time you saw a nude scene in a mainstream movie?
The first nude scene I ever saw was while watching The Sound of Music. I know what you're thinking--there's no nudity in that movie. Well, I didn't see the nudity in the movie, I saw it when I looked behind me and my babysitter was getting felt up by her boyfriend. You would think they would have the decency to do it in my parents' bedroom like our housekeeper and gardener (I'm a rich bitch you know, raised by maids).

What's your favorite nude scene in a movie?
Old School, when Will Ferrell is streaking down the street. "Honey, you think KFC's still open?"

Would you do or have you done a nude scene in a movie?
No, I haven't done a nude scene. Would I? Yes, but only if it's animated.





Related Links:
Megan Mooney's website
Old School