|Eva Amurri Martino as Jackie||Nude||breasts, butt||5||33|
|Embeth Davidtz as Felicia Koons|
|Diane Farr as Jill Robinson||NBD*||body double, breasts, butt||1||3|
|Meagan Good as Kali||Sexy||underwear||1||5|
|Maggie Grace as Faith||Nude+NBD*||body double, breasts, butt||3||17|
|Heather Graham as Julia||Sexy||underwear||1||2|
|Carla Gugino as Abby Rhodes||Sexy||underwear||2||9|
|Camilla Luddington as Lizzie||Nude||breasts, butt||5||18|
|Mercedes Masöhn as Amy Taylor Walsh||Sexy||underwear||1||4|
|Natascha McElhone as Karen|
|Addison Timlin as Sasha Bingham||Nude||breasts, butt||5||26|
|Madeline Zima as Mia||Nude||breasts||4||10|
|Pamela Adlon as Marcy||Nude||bush||3||12|
|Mädchen Amick as Janie Jones||Sexy||bikini||1||3|
|Brigitte Bako as Porsche Saleswoman||Sexy||underwear||1||2|
|Brooke Banner as Blonde||Nude||breasts, butt||1||4|
|Kristine Blackport as Kristine||Nude||breasts||1||6|
|Heather Chadwell as Heather||Nude||breasts||1|
|Camille Chen as Heather||Nude||breasts, butt||1||10|
|Kelen Coleman as Hope||Sexy||underwear||1||5|
|Brigette Davidovici as Nikki||Nude||breasts, butt||2||11|
|Alissa Dean as Rachel||Nude||breasts||1||5|
|Meghan Falcone as Shari||Nude||breasts||1||5|
|Carla Gallo as Daisy||Nude||breasts, butt||3||8|
|Judy Greer as Trixie||Sexy||underwear||1||5|
|Tara Holt as Melanie||Nude||butt||2||6|
|Sonni Laine as Ginger||Nude||butt||1||4|
|Alison Mei Lan as Hot Woman||Nude||breasts, bush, butt||1||2|
|Camille Langfield as Sandy||Nude||breasts||1||2|
|Alyssa LeBlanc as Betty||Nude||breasts, butt||2||6|
|Jenny Lin as Hooker||Nude||breasts||1||4|
|Michelle Lombardo as Venice Beach Girl||Sexy||bikini||2||4|
|Sammi Maben as Corinne||Nude||breasts, lesbian||1||6|
|Paula Marshall as Sonja||Nude||breasts, butt||2||4|
|Allison McAtee as Ali Andrews||Nude||breasts, butt||1||7|
|Rachel Miner as Dani||Nude||breasts, butt||4||13|
|Meredith Monroe as Chloe Metz||Nude||breasts||1||1|
|Nishi Munshi as Hot Actress||Nude||breasts||1||5|
|Laura Niles as Laura||Nude||breasts, bush, butt||2||8|
|Michele Nordin as Heather/Nun||Nude||breasts||1||2|
|Sarah Power as The Girl||Nude||breasts||1||2|
|Stacey Scowley as Tricia||Nude||breasts||1||7|
|Melissa Stephens as Peggy||Nude||breasts, butt||2||19|
|Megan Stevenson as Tabby||Nude||breasts, lesbian||2||9|
|Diana Terranova as Diana||Nude||breasts||1||7|
|Callie Thorne as Julia||Nude||breasts||2||11|
|Bridgetta Tomarchio as Veronica||Nude||breasts||3||8|
|Alanna Ubach as The Widow||Sexy||thong||1||3|
|Christina Ulloa as Elizabeth||Nude||breasts, butt||1||6|
|Zita Vass as Destiny||Nude||breasts, bush, butt||2||6|
|Ellen Woglom as Chelsea Koons||Sexy||underwear||1||3|
Episode: "Verities & Balderdash" (Oct 11th, 2009)
Episode: "Zoso" (Oct 18th, 2009)
Episode: "Mia Culpa" (Dec 13th, 2009)
Episode: "Mia Culpa" (Dec 13th, 2009)
Episode: "Quitters" (Jan 20th, 2013)
Episode: "Dead Rock Stars" (Jan 27th, 2013)
Episode: "Everybody's A F**king Critic" (Mar 10th, 2013)
Episode: "Raw" (Mar 4th, 2012)
Episode: "At the Movies" (Mar 11th, 2012)
Episode: "Exile On Main St." (Jan 9th, 2011)
Episode: "Suicide Solution" (Jan 16th, 2011)
Episode: "Exile On Main St." (Jan 9th, 2011)
Episode: "Lawyers, Guns and Money" (Feb 13th, 2011)
Episode: "Julia" (Apr 20th, 2014)
Episode: "Wish You Were Here" (Sep 27th, 2009)
Episode: "Home Sweet Home" (Jan 23rd, 2011)
Episode: "Getting the Poison Out" (May 11th, 2014)
Episode: "Kickoff" (May 18th, 2014)
Episode: "Hell Bent for Leather" (Feb 10th, 2013)
Episode: "Rock And A Hard Place" (Feb 17th, 2013)
Episode: "Coke Dick & The First Kick" (Nov 2nd, 2008)
Episode: "Going Down and Out in Beverly Hills" (Nov 16th, 2008)
Episode: "Julia" (Apr 20th, 2014)
Episode: "JFK to LAX" (Jan 8th, 2012)
Episode: "Perverts & Whores" (Mar 18th, 2012)
Episode: "Hell Bent for Leather" (Feb 10th, 2013)
Episode: "The Whore of Babylon" (Aug 27th, 2007)
Episode: "The Whore of Babylon" (Aug 27th, 2007)
Episode: "Vaginatown" (Oct 26th, 2008)
Episode: "Like Father Like Son" (Apr 27th, 2014)
Episode: "The Devil's Threesome" (Oct 15th, 2007)
Episode: "At the Movies" (Mar 11th, 2012)
Episode: "The Dope Show" (Mar 3rd, 2013)
Episode: "Another Perfect Day" (Mar 6th, 2011)
Episode: "Grace" (Jun 29th, 2014)
Episode: "Comings & Goings" (Dec 6th, 2009)
Episode: "Slip of the Tongue" (Sep 28th, 2008)
Everything comes full circle on the series finale of Californication. Hank (David Duchovny) opens the episode waking up from a nightmare where Becca (Madeleine Martin) commits suicide. Even worse, he wakes up to Charlie (Evan Handler) sleeping in his bed because he and Marcy (Pamela Adlon) had a fight. Hank goes to see Karen (Natasha McElhone) who tells him that Becca has gone to be with her fiancee.
Hank then has to go to the police station with Julia (Heather Graham) to bail Levon (Oliver Cooper) out of jail, and Julia is upset that Levon now has a criminal record, and gets mad at Hank. Hank tells Levon that he has to stop paying for sex and find women that want to sleep with him without having to get paid. He then tells Julia that Levon was the best surprise of his adult life, they kiss, and Hank leaves them, promising to meet her that night at a restaurant.
Hank returns home to discover that Krull (Steve Jones) has brought hookers over for him and Charlie. Hank finds Charlie unable to get it up with his hooker (Kelen Coleman), but Krull is just humping away with his hooker (Diana Terranova), who bares her huge hooters! Charlie and Marcy make up after Marcy finally levels with Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky) that they can never be together.
At the restaurant where he promised to meet her, Julia is shocked to see Rath (Michael Imperioli) show up instead. The two realize that Hank has set them up. Hank has gone, instead, to the airport to catch Karen before she flies to New York to see Becca, and tells her that he wants to be with her. They fly together, reconciled and happy, to a brighter tomorrow, and so ends one of the most skinsational shows in the history of television!
Amy (Mercedes Masöhn) attempts to seduce Hank (David Duchovny), but when Rath (Michael Imperioli) spots their flirtation, he warns Hank not to bang the actresses. Not wanting to deal with Hashtag (Brandon T. Jackson), Rath decides to tell Hank that he is now producing the episode, and as Hank heads back to the set, Julie (Heather Graham) pulls him into her trailer for a quickie! It's a hot scene, but it's over pretty quick because Levon (Oliver Cooper) knocks on the door, breaking up the scene before she can get nude!
Hashtag then tells Hank that he wants him to write a kissing scene with Amy into the script so he can make out with her. Hashtag leaves and Hank is summoned to Amy's trailer, and she attempts to get it on with him. She begins stripping off her clothes, but then Hashtag interrupts them. Enough with these interruptions already! This used to be the most skinsational show on television. Now it just feels like they're messing with us!
It's the "Santa Monica Cop" kickoff party at Rath (Michael Imperioli)'s house tonight, but first they've got to get through the table read. Hashtag (Brandon T. Jackson) rants at the writers that they need to not just cram any old nonsense and jargon into the script, it has to feel real. Hank (David Duchovny) and Goldie (Mary Lynn Rajskub) are thoroughly unimpressed however. Needless to say, this puts Hashtag and Hank off on the wrong foot. Seriously, the guy's name is Hashtag? It's like they're not even trying anymore and, well, clearly they're not.
Rath lays out one simple ground rule for the kickoff party. No sex in his pool. Seems simple enough, right? Well of course it's not that simple. Levon (Oliver Cooper) is having sex with Nikki (Brigitte Davidovici) in Rath's pool and Rath and Julia (Heather Graham) are both very upset at Levon. When Levon tells Julia that it was Hank that got him the hooker, she slaps Hank. Hank then reveals that he is broke because all of his money is going towards his son's hooker habit. He's not even sure how he's going to pay his rent this month.
Rath (Michael Imperioli) tells Hank (David Duchovny) about his date with Julia (Heather Graham), and Hank assures him that he's okay with it. He decides to tell Levon (Oliver Cooper) about it as well, but Levon tells him that he already knew about the date, and tells Rath that his mother tells him everything. Rath begins to second guess his decision to take Julia out, but Levon reassures him that he should give his mom a shot.
With Julia out of the picture for the night, Hank decides to take Levon out for the night of his life with Karen (Natascha McElhone) and Marcy (Pamela Adlon). When Hank mentions to Marcy that he wants to get Levon laid, Marcy mentions a client of hers, Nikki (Brigette Davidovici), who is an escort. When Nikki arrives, she becomes excited, thinking that Hank is her client for the night, but Hank introduces her to Levon. Karen implores Hank not to use a prostitute for Levon's first time, and when Hank decides to convince Levon of this, Nikki strips off her dress, revealing her sensational snoobs and seat meat! Levon tells Hank he doesn't care and wants to bang her!
Marcy, Karen, Hank, and Nikki's pimp all wait for them to come out of the room, and when they finally do, Levon thanks Hank for the best night of his life!
Julia (Heather Graham) informs Hank (David Duchovny) that she is auditioning for Rath (Michael Imperioli) , and even though Hank is somewhat jealous of the fact that Rath seems to dig Julia, he is also happy that he may see her around the studio more. Rath talks to Hank to make sure that he is fine with him pursuing Julia, and Hank gives him the all-clear.
Levon (Oliver Cooper) tells Hank that he is hot for Melanie (Tara Holt), Rath's assistant. Hank tries to sway her elsewhere, but Levon's got his sights set on Melanie. Levon makes some small talk with Melanie at the office when one of the scumbag writers comes in and sends Levon to get coffee. Levon leaves, but is shocked when he comes back to find Melanie getting banged from behind by the writer. Her shirt is off, but sadly her long hair keeps her best bits all covered up! Melanie tells Levon later that since he's just a PA, he doesn't have a shot with her.
Julia gets the part and tells Hank, who is excited for her. Later, she shows him her skills as a dental hygienist, and the two begin to make out! Julia and Hank agree that what happened cannot happen again, and they tell Levon as much too. Hank and Julia share a joint, and she begins to look at him as if she wants something to happen again!
Karen (Natascha McElhone) is upset with Hank (David Duchovny) over the fact that she was not his first "baby mama." Hank tries to convince her that it was actually a good thing that he got Julia (Heather Graham) pregnant before he even knew her, but Karen's having none of that. She reminds him that he has to tell Becca (Madeleine Martin) about her "brother" Levon (Oliver Cooper).
Hank takes Levon with him to the studio, and Terry (John Madison Tye) begins to knock Hank's ideas, or lack thereof. Hank begins to get into a groove, however, which really perks up Rath (Michael Imperioli), but then Levon bursts into the room with food for Rath, and Rath explodes at him that it's not what he wanted and makes him feel like shit in front of everyone. Hank goes to see Levon and cheer him up, and Levon reveals that he wants to sleep with Rath's assistant.
Because of his great ideas, Rath invites Hank to sit in on auditions, much to the chagrin of Terry. Rath is called outside just as a sexy brunette (Nishi Munshi) comes in to read. She pulls out her tit for Hank and then uses his hand to begin pleasuring herself. Terry walks in as this is happening and tries to rat Hank out to Rath.
Karen (Natascha McElhone) is very turned on by the fact that Hank (David Duchovny) seems to be getting himself together, and she gives him a "murse" to reward him! Hank reports for his first day as head writer on Santa Monica Cop, and Charlie (Evan Handler) decides to tag along for moral support. He reveals to Hank that he and Marcy (Pamela Adlon) have been having "problems" in the bedroom, though Marcy lays all the blame on Charlie. Marcy tries to spice things up by telling him stories about her exes, which don't help Charlie, but do give us an accidental lip slip from Marcy as she flails about on the bed!
At the studio, Charlie and Hank are introduced to an intern named Melanie (Tara Holt), who shows off some fantastic plumber's crack! Hank finds himself at odds with the other writers, in particular an alpha male type named Terry (John Madison Tye). Strapped for ideas, Hank tells the other writers about Levon (Oliver Cooper) and Julia (Heather Graham), and how he just found out that morning that he was Levon's dad, which they jump on and begin to craft a story around.
Julia comes to Hank's house that night to scold him for not staying out of their lives. Hank apologizes and Julia sees his guitar, which she picks up and begins playing. Just then Karen comes over, and Hank greets her at the door with a big hug, but when she sees Julia, she simply says "Oh no!" End of episode.
Hank (David Duchovny) crushes Becca (Madeleine Martin)'s dreams of being a writer by telling her that her book is no good. He encourages her to write something new, but she gets very upset with him for not being supportive, and Karen (Natasha McElhone) lays into him for doing so. Hank could care less though, as he has just finished his musical and has given it to Charlie (Evan Handler) to give to Atticus (Tim Minchin). He gets his comeuppance though when everyone trashes his draft of the musical in a similar fashion to how he trashed his daughter's book.
Hank seeks solace, and knows that only Faith (Maggie Grace) can provide it. She encourages him to not be so cynical in his approach to the story, as it is a love story after all. The most helpful thing she does for Hank, though, is talk to him with her heinie exposed! That's more inspiration than any man needs, just be careful not to get lost in those gorgeous glutes of hers!
Hank (David Duchovny) comes home to discover that Becca (Madeleine Martin) and her friends have trashed his house. He confronts Becca's boyfriend by punching him in the stomach when he discovers that he was on his way to get a condom when Hank came home.
Charlie (Evan Handler) takes his son Stu to the mall to play at the play area, and here he meets a single mom named Tricia (Stacey Scowley). She propositions him to meet her in the bathroom and when Charlie gets there, Tricia is topless and holding a video camera. Turns out she's an online porn star and wants to videotape him getting a blow job from her! He agrees, but only if he can wear a mask, but things go south when he blows his load too soon and doesn't finish on her face as she requested! Who can blame him for finishing so fast, those ta-tas are terrific!
Hank (David Duchovny) is facing a major case of writer's block as the episode begins, and determines that he needs a muse, and for that, he can only turn to one woman, Faith (Maggie Grace). He goes to find Charlie (Evan Handler) first, who is still reeling from having been fired after being exposed for faking his homosexuality. Hank tells Charlie that he has an idea that will get them both out of debt, and it involves the musical he is planning to write with Atticus (Tim Minchin). Atticus agrees to take on Charlie as his agent if Charlie can track down a guitar that belonged to his dead friend, as well as some cocaine.
Their quest to find the guitar leads them, of course, right to Faith. When they arrive at the pad where Faith is staying, Hank and Charlie are greeted at the door by a topless woman named Shari (Meghan Falcone) who looks simply sensational without a shirt on! After tracking down the guitar to a drug dealer, who accepts Charlie's suit as a fair trade for the guitar, and securing the cocaine, Atticus hires both Hank and Charlie, and Hank celebrates by trying to seal the deal with Faith.
Out of rehab, Hank (David Duchovny) reunites with Charlie (Evan Handler) who brings him up to speed on his new venture as a "gaygent." Charlie's deception is almost spoiled, however, when Robbie (Johann Urb) propositions him. To help him relax, Ali's assistant Rachel (Alissa Dean) blows Charlie and offers to sleep with him. She goes into the bathroom to put in her diaphragm, and just then Robbie walks in and sees him naked, thinking he's ready to have sex with him. Just then, Rachel walks out of the bathroom nude, giving us a nice look at her sensational skin sacks, but the fun ends when Charlie accuses her of trying to take advantage of him! Rachel informs him that Charlie is straight, forcing him to come clean, and Robbie fires him!
While all of this is going on, Hank and Ali (Allison McAtee) engage in some make-up sex, showing off her phenomenal fun bags and fanny! The rendezvous is short-lived though, as Charlie bursts into Hank's room to tell him what just happened and interrupts them! Hank returns to Karen (Natasha McElhone) and tells her that he is ready to give their relationship another chance, to which Karen responds that it is going to take time for her wounds to heal.
During group therapy, Faith (Maggie Grace) reveals that she entered rehab because she woke up next to a dead rock star. To attain some closure, she is encouraged to attend his funeral and she convinces Hank (David Duchovny) to tag along. Things go south in a hurry at the funeral when the dead rock star's widow (Alana Ubach) confronts Faith at the funeral, recognizing her as the woman who was sleeping with her husband. We get some nice looks at her ass in a thong when she confronts her, which is a nice bonus bit!
Hank manages to make peace with the widow, enough so that he and Faith can attend the after party at the mansion of Atticus Fetch (Tim Minchin). At the party, Faith takes off her dress and flashes her fantastic fanny at Hank! Sadly the shot of her diving in is a body double, but that first shot is all Maggie! Everything comes to a head, however, when Karen (Natasha McElhone) shows up for work the next morning and discovers Hank passed out on the ground among a bevy of naked people, and not in rehab where he was supposed to be.
Hank (David Duchovny) is adjusting to his life in rehab, something he never would have foreseen when he was admitted at the end of the last episode. Most of that has to do with Faith (Maggie Grace) a fellow patient and self-described "muse" to many rock stars. Of all the patients he meets, Faith is the one who seems to be snapping him out of his funk. She'll work similar magic on you when she shows up in Hank's room wearing nothing but an unbuttoned dress shirt! She looks sexy as hell, and when she climbs on top of him, we get our first ever look at Maggie's mams, though it is a brief flash! Too bad for Hank, this turned out to be a dream!
Meanwhile Charlie (Evan Handler) continues his charade of posing as a gay agent to sign superstar gay actor Robbie Mac (Johann Urb). And in the most interesting twist of the episode, Karen (Natasha McElhone) gets a job as an interior decorator for a woman (Sarah Wynter) who turns out to be the wife of Atticus Fetch (Tim Minchin), the man who wants to turn one of Hank's books into a Broadway musical!
Karen (Natascha McElhone), Hank (David Duchovny), and Becca (Madeleine Martin) are enjoying some exclusive family time together since Karen’s husband Bates is still in rehab. Unfortunately Becca can’t really enjoy having her dad around becase her relationship with Tyler (Scott Michael Foster) has been on the outs ever since he took Hank’s role as lead writer for Santa Monica Cop. Not only has Tyler taken Hank’s role on set, he’s also taken his role in Kali’s bed, which could be very dangerous for him if Samurai (RZA) finds out.
Charlie (Evan Handler) is trying to woo Hank back to his agency and back to his role as best friend. His affair with ex-nanny Lizzie (Camilla Luddington) is heading down the drain as well after Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky) admits that she gave him a BJ to land a role in his movie.
Hank meets with a potential new agent, Larry (Daniel Benzali), and hot-tempered director, Lars (Clement Von Franckenstein), to discuss the next move for his career. Their meeting soon turns booze soaked and Lars orders a round of prostitutes for everyone, with Hank coincidentally getting matched up with the working girl from his last drug binge, Trixie (Judy Greer). But when Lars starts screaming at his topless escort (Jenny Lin), Hank punches him to defend her honor. After seeing those perky melons we’d like to get honor and off her and honor again…
Hank (David Duchovny) is still working on the set of Santa Monica Cop, and the lead actress (Sarah Power) will do anything to get her character part beefed up. Speaking of beef, she takes down her top to get Hank’s opinion on her spectacular suckers and he replies that she should get a “Mr. Skin award.” Our fearless leader couldn’t agree more!
Unfortunately Hank’s indiscretions on set put his position as writer in jeopardy, which comes to a head when Samurai Apocalypse (RZA) has his thugs hang Hank over the side of a building. He gets pulled back in but subsequently punched in the gut by Samurai and fired from the flick. Tyler (Scott Michael Foster) takes Hank’s place as on set writer, but Hank does get a nice cheer up evening out with Karen (Natascha McElhone) and Becca (Madeleine Martin).
Meanwhile femme fatale Lizzie (Camilla Luddington) is convincing Charlie (Evan Handler) to stick with up-and-comer Tyler as a client despite Hank’s adamant protestations. She uses her feminine wiles by showing of her moist mini-mams and glimpse of cute cheeks while nude hot-tubing with him. Now that’s a wet dream!
Hank Moody (David Duchocvny) comes home to find Samurai (RZA) waiting for him in his darkened living room, and just when he thinks the jig is up about humping Kali, Samurai just brings in Eddie Nero (Rob Lowe) to star in his new movie.
Becca’s (Madeleine Martin) boyfriend, Tyler (Scott Michael Foster), has written a script and gives it to Hank for a read-through. Hank likes the script, but has no interest in promoting it thanks to its vivid, semi-autobiographical account of his daughter’s sex life. Unfortunately Eddie Nero comes across the script at Hank’s place and loves it, thrusting Tyler into the spotlight and a contract with Charlie.
Charlie (Evan Handler) and Lizzie (Camilla Luddington) are still banging like bunnies, even though it’s starting to become clear that Lizzie only wants Charlie for his money and influence.Their roll in the hay, where Lizzie bares nubile niblets and succulent seat meat, is interrupted by Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky) and Marcy (Pamela Adlon) bursting in to do the horizontal mambo themselves, and we get a great view of Marcy’s plush panty-covered posterior before their role-playing offends Charlie in his hiding spot. You’ll want to role-play doctor with those two naughty nurses.
Karen’s (Natascha McElhone) new husband, Richard Bates (Jason Beghe), has taken a turn for the worse and is dissolving into alcoholism. When Bates sleeps with a stripper named Holly (Drea De Matteo) on one of his drunken outings, Hank (David Duchovny) takes the blame to spare Karen’s feelings.
Charlie (Evan Handler) has a crush on little Stuart’s nanny, Lizzie (Camilla Luddington), but doesn’t feel comfortable pursuing her while his ex employs her. Fortunately after Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky) finds Lizzie skinny-dipping in his pool, she is unceremoniously fired by Marcy (Pamela Adlon). While Stu recounts the tale to Charlie, we get a gorgeous flashback view of Lizzie rising naked out of the pool like a slippery Venus. Without the encumbrance of her employment Charlie is free to get busy, and Lizzie strips again revealing more of her perfect roundies and dreamy derriere. Anyone up for a dip?
When Samurai Apocalypse (RZA) tasks Hank (David Duchovny) with writing a love song, it takes Hank on a trip down memory lane with his first love, Karen (Natascha McElhone). When the lovebirds first moved from New York to LA, they assumed the power of their love could keep them safe from the treacherous waters of Hollywood. But as we know, it didn’t take too long for Hank’s reckless behavior to get the better of him.
Hank's new songwriting partner is Samurai’s muse, Kali (Meagan Good), who has a breakup story of her own to use for inspiration. She left her former fiancé in New York to pursue her dream of becoming a singer in LA. Communing over lost love leads to Kali and Hank making beautiful music in the bedroom, despite the ominous threat of their mutual benefactor Samurai. Kali peels off her top to reveal some compelling cleavage that is close to bursting out of her back lace bra. Those racktacular records will make your head spin!
Hank (David Duchovny) is back, and the first thing he has to do is destroy Carrie’s (Natalie Zea) dreams of a happy life with him. Charlie calls him with the good news that he has found work for him back in Cali. Even better news, once Hank gets on the plane his seatmate is a beautiful woman, Kali (Meagan Good). Trouser snakes on a plane!
The boys head to Stu’s (Stephen Tobolowsky) house to talk about the writing project and walk in on him eating Marci’s (Pamela Adlon) Egg McMuffin. Stu is just happy to see everyone and sends Hank off to meet with rapper Samurai Apocalypse (RZA).
Sam has hit the jackpot with his latest release and wants Hank to write the screenplay vehicle, “Santa Monica Cop”, for him to cement his star power.
After Carrie spends the entire episode angrily texting him, Hank gets a call that she has set his place on fire. He walks into Charlie’s house to find him having celebratory sex with his 100th sexual conquest, Ginger (Sonni Laine). Beautiful view of her comely caboose as she runs out of the room. Mr. Skin loves happy endings!
The big day is here and Hank (David Duchovny) stands before the court to plead his case. When the judge pronounces the sentence of three years in prison, Hank passes out and hits the floor. When he comes to he finds out that he heard the judge incorrectly, she said three years probation, Hank is a free man. He celebrates in the only way possible by having a roll in the hay with his lawyer Abby (Carla Gugino). She gets out of her law suit to show her wobblers in a lacy bra.
Everyone gathers at Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky) and Marcy’s (Pamela Adlon) place for a post-trial celebration, but tensions are high with all the exes in one room. Peggy (Melissa Stephens) accuses Charlie (Evan Handler) of still being in love with Marcy(Pamela Adlon), and when he admits he is, Marcy declares that she is pregnant with his child. Peggy stabs Charlie in the hand then goes after Marcy. Catfight!
After the disastrous party Karen (Natascha McElhone) and Becca (Madeleine Martin) pack up to go on a vacation with Ben (Michael Ealy), and Hank realizes that they may never be a happy family again. He goes to his movie set and immerses himself in the production.
Breast of show: Abby nearly bursting out of her legal briefs!
Hank (David Duchovny) is low on cash and has no place to live, so Karen (Natascha McElhone) takes some pity on him and allows him to stay with her and Becca (Madeleine Martin). The stress of the trial and Hank’s return weighs heavy on Becca, and later that night she drunkenly steals his car and crashes it.
Marcy (Pamela Adlon) finds out she is pregnant but has no idea who the father is. When she gives the good news to her boyfriend Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky) he assumes it is his.
Charlie (Evan Handler) is still hooking up with his kinky real estate agent Peggy (Melissa Stephens). She rides him in bed showing her mams and moon while acting out her forbidden fantasies. The best realtors give you a tour of their top floor and basement!
Sasha (Addison Timlin) has decided that she wants to be in Hank’s (David Duchovny) movie ,but she wants him to do some rewrites for her current film first. While on the set they get kinky with her character’s cuffs until a call from Becca (Madeleine Martin) interrupts the scene. Hank leaves Sasha cuffed to her trailer with her shirt open, showing her magnificent mams in a black bra. That cop costume will have you bringing out your riot hose!
Later that night Hank is doing his usual evening penance at a bar where he meets out of towner Julia (Callie Thorne). They head back to his place where she breaks out her succulent sweater puppies. A bar hookup will cure what ales you!
When morning arrives Sasha comes by to check on Hank and tell him that her mother is in town for a visit. Three guesses who her mother is. Julia comes out of the bathroom right on time with her sweet stacks still exposed. Sasha kicks Hank in the nuts and both ladies leave angry.
The sale of Charlie’s (Evan Handler) house falls through in escrow and the realtor Peggy (Melissa Stephens) comes by to talk it out. They end up in bed where we get to see her shakers and seat meat. Nice tracts of land!
Karen (Natascha McElhone) has a new boyfriend, Ben (Michael Ealy), which leaves Hank feeling very jealous. All three go to watch Becca’s (Madeleine Martin) band play a gig and Karen holds hands with both men underneath the table.
Movie producer Stu (Stephen Tobolowsky) takes Marcy (Pamela Adlon) and Charlie (Evan Handler) to pitch a show idea based on Marcy’s life to the Showtime Network. The premise of the show is to see the world of Hollywood through the eyes of a muff waxer to the stars. Stu is having a hard time selling it, but when he leaves for the bathroom, fast talking Charlie manages to bag it.
Hank has fallen into bed with his attorney Abby (Carla Gugino) and when they wake up in the morning she tells him if they are sleeping together she can’t defend him. He makes the breast choice and decides to get another lawyer. Abby shows off her lush body in some lacy lingerie. Those retainers will never lose their appeal!
After a photo of Hank (David Duchovny), Mia (Madeline Zima), and Sasha (Addison Timlin) lying in bed together is circulated by Mia’s friend, Hank is getting a lot of bad press. Sasha wants to drop out of the film so she can be with Hank and not cause any publicity trouble.
But Eddie Nero (Rob Lowe) still wants to play Hank and they go out for drinks with Charlie to discuss the possibility. Becca interrupts the boys’ night by calling Hank from a tattoo parlor where she can’t pay her bill. Hank goes to pick her up with Eddie Nero tagging along, but when they arrive Eddie freaks out and pulls out a gun on the tattooist. Fortunately, the shop recognizes that Nero is a big star and the scene turns friendly.
Sasha teases Hank by taking her top off to show her scrumptious snuggle pups before she is interrupted by a knock at the door. The only knockers we want to answer are Sashas!
Hank (David Duchovny) finishes the movie script and it looks like the film is getting the green light. The crew heads to film financier Zig’s (Fisher Stevens) house to celebrate. The in-home entertainment is provided by Zig’s girlfriends Tabby (Megan Stevenson) and Corinne (Sammi Maben), who press their twin peaks together and make out on the sofa. Now that’s hosp-tit-ality!
Charlie (Evan Handler) gets lucky with one of Zig’s girls and they go upstairs to get it on. Tabby’s teats aren’t too shabby and she jumps Charlie’s bone until they are sadly interrupted by Zig’s pet monkey. Charlie tries to take the monkey out of the room, but when it attacks him he throws it against the wall and accidentally kills it. He goes to break the news to Zig only to find him dead, apparently from autoerotic asphyxiation. The cops come but Hank calls his luscious lawyer Abby (Carla Gugino) to deal with it. No more spanking the monkey after this episode!
All the hard partying catches up with Hank (David Duchovny) as he wakes up in the hospital having his stomach pumped. Turns out overdosing was the best thing he could have done as Karen (Natascha McElhone), thinking he attempted suicide, agrees to nurse him back to health.
Becca (Madeleine Martin) is earning some extra money by playing her guitar on the boardwalk, but when she leaves it alone for a minute she comes back to find it stolen. She is furious with Hank for trying to kill himself, and so he confesses that it wasn’t really a suicide attempt- he just had a little too much. When Karen hears the truth from Becca, she kicks Hank right back to the curb.
Charlie (Evan Handler) is doing a little better as he gets laid by Heather (Camille Chen). Heather is mixing business with pleasure as she checks her email on a blackberry while Charlie bonks her. Suddenly getting slammed with work doesn’t seem so bad!
Hank (David Duchovny) is still not welcome at home so he is staying at the Runkle's place. When their couch is not soft enough, he wakes up in bed with Marcy (Pamela Adlon), scaring both of them, but Charlie (Evan Handler) wants to cuddle. Becca (Madeleine Martin) finally agrees to see him again, but when they meet up at a guitar store it’s obvious that it’s going to take a while for her to forgive him.
Hank gets introduced to Eddie Nero (Rob Lowe), who wants to play him in the upcoming movie but can’t stomach hanging out with Charlie.
Hank should be spending his time writing the script for his movie but all he wants to do is drink and have sex with the movie’s star, Sasha (Addison Timlin). We get a glance at her Hollywood hills while she changes clothes in front of Hank. Those scene stealers deserve their own award!
Hank (David Duchovny) gets bailed out of jail by Charlie (Evan Handler), but doesn’t have much waiting for him at home since Karen (Natascha McElhone) refuses to see him. His novel “Fucking and Punching” is being advertised everywhere and the secret is out that he, not Mia (Madeline Zima), is the author.
The hype has led to a few good things, though, since studio execs now want to turn the novel into a movie. Hank and Charlie attend a preliminary meeting with Sasha (Addison Timlin), who is auditioning for the lead role. When asked if she is comfortable with nudity Sasha shows it’s no problem at all by lifting her shirt to show her spotlights. Racktacular!
Hank lawyers up with smoking-hot litigator Abby (Carla Gugino). She agrees to take his case and manages to get the assault charges dropped. Unfortunately Hank is promptly charged with the assaulting Mia.
Sasha takes her method acting very seriously and wants to recreate the scene where Mia punches him in the book. Fortunately this means Hank gets to see her bean bags and buns as she grinds on top of him. It ends with Hank getting a black eye, but hey- that’s better than blue balls!
The episode starts out with Hank (David Duchovny) having a nightmare that Karen (Natascha McElhone) and Becca (Madeleine Martin) are leaving him while he floats in a pool surrounded by naked women. Jackie (Eva Amurri) floats out her life preservers before attempting to pull him underwater. Talk about a wet dream!
The Moody family is preparing to move back to New York and everything is going well, until prodigal daughter Mia (Madeline Zima) comes back into the picture. Fortunately she shows up wearing the same string bikini she left in. She’s having trouble writing a second book, and since she stole her first one from Hank, it’s not much of a surprise. Her manger Paul (James Frain) knows the truth and wants Hank to come clean in public as a publicity stunt for everyone involved.
Hank doesn’t want anything to do with the drama but when Paul calls him a train wreck and a lousy father he snaps and punches him. Hank runs home to Karen as Paul calls the police. He finally confesses to sleeping with Mia and as Karen cries and breaks up with him, the cops show up at their house. Distraught Hank is not thinking clearly and throws a punch at one of the cops, only to be promptly arrested. At least he can still dream about Jackie’s slippery suckers in jail!
At the end of the school semester Felicia (Embeth Davidtz) has a lunch party and invites everyone Hank has been sleeping with. The scene is calm though, and no one seems too angry at Hank for being a man-whore. Richard Bates (Jason Beghe), the man whose job Hank took, gets out of rehab and it turns out Karen (Natascha McElhone) had a fling with him before she met Hank.
Hank is jealous for the first time in a long time when he finds out Bates is not only a better professor than him but also banged the love of his life.
Charlie (Evan Handler) and Marcy (Pamela Adlon) get a serious buyer for their house and their divorce papers come in, but they can’t seem to get around to signing them.
Charlie gets some extra martial action from Elizabeth (Christine Ulloa) as she rides him reverse cowgirl on his bedroom floor. Her cute cheeks are on display then a long look at her num-nums after Marcy interrupts the belly ride.
Hank’s (David Duchovny) apartment is chick central as each of his three flings show up to profess their love for him. Felicia (Embeth Davidtz) comes by to tell him she has left her husband for him. His TA Jill (Diane Farr) shows up wearing only a raincoat and flashes her apples for teacher. That TA’s T&A gets an A+
Jackie (Eva Amurri) arrives with two stripper friends to tell Hank she has given up stripping to become a writer and be with him. Hank walks into his bedroom and finds the three ladies passed out in his bed in a gleesome threesome of undress.
Adding a few more people to the mix, Charlie (Evan Handler) shows up with his client Rick Springfield and they end up double-teaming Jackie’s friend Betty (Alyssa LeBlanc). Betty’s butt and bouncers get plenty of stage time as she tells Hank she fine with the situation, they are getting a bang for their buck. Rickrolled has a whole new meaning now.
Hank apologizes to Becca (Madeleine Martin) as the final stripper Veronica (Bridgetta Tomarchio) wakes up after being passed out the whole day. Her hedonistic honkers are out as she searches for her lost clothes. Wake and Shake!
The three women that Hank (David Duchovny) has been banging on the regular are all starting to get attached and it’s up to Hank to set them straight. Unfortunately sleeping with them again after you break up tends to send the wrong message.
Charlie (Evan Handler) is trying his best to keep hippie client Peter Fonda from breaking up his professional relationship with agent Sue (Kathleen Turner). He’s able to convince him that Sue will not sell him out and turn him into a corporate brand.
Becca (Madeleine Martin) is getting a bad influence from her new friend Chelsea Koons (Ellen Woglom) the Dean’s daughter. Hank catches Chelsea using Becca’s room to hook up with her boyfriend, and gets a quick look at her adorable perky peepers in a purple bra as she gets dressed. That bad girl needs a good spanking!
Hank (David Duchovny) is missing Karen (Natascha McElhone) more than ever, but that isn’t stopping him from getting plenty of furburgerage.
He’s still sleeping with his Dean’s wife, Felicia (Embeth Davidtz), who is mostly interested in getting revenge on her husband for his affair. His other piece of crumpet, Jill (Diane Farr), walks in on them in the act and swears she won’t sleep with Hank again. That lasts about 10 minutes.
Charlie (Evan Handler) and Marcy (Pamela Adlon) finally get on offer on their house, but find themselves sabotaging the sale at the last minute. Turns out neither one of them wants to accept the finality of living apart.
Hank’s favorite student/stripper has dropped his class, so he takes Charlie to the club she works at to ask her why. No excuse needed. He gets a lap dance from Jackie (Eva Amurri) while she shakes her copious chest chumbawumbas and talks about her business major. That will have you grading on a curve!
Charlie (Evan Handler) has a lunch meeting with a possible client for the agency- Rick Springfield- and he gets some help from his new boss Sue (Kathleen Turner). Her wild coked-up past with Springfield is just what they need to land him. Charlie and Sue celebrate with a nooner on his desk, where they are unfortunately interrupted by an angry Marcy (Pamela Adlon) mid-coitus.
Women continue to throw themselves at Hank and he’s knocking off a piece of the Dean’s wife, Felicia (Embeth Davidtz), and his TA, Jill (Diane Farr). The breast part of the show comes in a dream Hank has about his student, Jackie (Eva Amurri), pole dancing. Jackie strips to show her gorgeous glandular goodyears then grinds all over the stage for Hank. Break out the Benjamins, because dollar bills aren’t good enough for those magnificent melons!
Hank (David Duchovny) is depressed. He can’t get his latest book published, the love of his life is far away in New York, and his daughter is smoking all his weed.
Marcy (Pamela Adlon) is still divorcing Charlie (Evan Handler) and seems unmoved by his lovelorn pleas for her to take him back. Plus, his new boss Sue (Kathleen Turner) is riding him at work and seems pretty interested in riding him in her spare time too.
Hank gets a new job as a college professor after encouraging the previous professor to fall off the sobriety wagon. To cap off the night, he picks up Kristine (Kristine Blackport) at a club and things go from open bar to open bra. She shows her martini boppers while riding Hank until she realizes he’s fallen asleep. That boobage is sure to keep Mr. Skin up all night!
Charlie (Evan Handler) is down in the dumps, more specifically the Valley, where he is working as a used car salesman and living in a cramped apartment with his porn star sweetie, Daisy (Carla Gallo). When he finds out the Daisy has screwed someone else he begs Marcy (Pamela Adlon) to take him back.
Sonja (Paula Marshall) has her baby, and when it’s obvious Hank (David Duchovny) is not the father, he convinces Karen (Natascha McElhone) to give him another chance. Karen is moving back to New York to take a job and even though Hank wants to be with her he decides to stay in LA so Becca (Madeleine Martin) can finish school and not be uprooted.
As Hank and Becca walk along the Venice Beach boardwalk they run into titillating thief Michelle (Michelle Lombardo), who is still brandishing her buoys in a barely there bikini. All that surfer chick needs is your ocean spray!
Mia (Madeline Zima) and Ashby (Callum Keith Rennie) are continuing their relationship despite Hank’s (David Duchovny) protests, and when Karen (Natascha McElhone) finds out she steps in to warn Ashby off the jailbait.
The biography on Ashby is progressing as Hank interviews his former flame Janie Jones (Mädchen Amick) while she lounges in a string bikini. Ashby claims she is the one who got away but she says that she was just tired of sharing him. If she got away in that bikini, Mr. Skin wouldn’t mind seeing her coming or going!
Despite his busy schedule Hank still finds time to have a quickie with Janie’s maid in the pool house before they are interrupted by Janie’s husband.
Charlie (Evan Handler) sends Marcy (Pamela Adlon) to sober up at her mother’s place in the desert. Things don’t go to plan and Marcy’s mother calls to inform him she never showed up.
Charlie has something much better occupying his mind now that he’s alone with petite porn princess Daisy (Carla Gallo). She thanks Charlie for his help by whipping off her shirt to bare her adorable badoinkies before getting down to business. Daisy’s flowers will have your stinger ready to pollinate!
When Hank (David Duchovny) has a nice parent-teacher conference with Becca's teacher, things end up the usual way…in bed. This lands him in hot water with Becca (Madeleine Martin), whose boyfriend is the teacher’s son.
Charlie’s (Evan Handler) perky porno star Daisy (Carla Gallo) is having financial problems so he lets her stay with him, then Marcy (Pamela Adlon) does him one better by insisting they all share a bed. When Charlie later checks on his savings, he discovers that Marcy has spent it all on blow.
Ashby (Callum Keith Rennie) is hooking up with underage Mia (Madeline Zima) and though Hank tries to warn him off her, he isn’t showing any signs of stopping. Since Hank is writing Ashby’s biography he has to try and stay on his good side. When he catches them in the act he gets a good look at Mia’s melons nearly bursting out of her bra. That perfect 10 will get you 20!
Hank’s (David Duchovny) ex Sonja (Paula Marshall) is pregnant with his baby, so when he walks in on her new boyfriend Julian (Angus Macfadyen) screwing someone else he’s concerned. He tries to get Karen (Natascha McElhone) to tell Sonja about it, but she’s got the sense not to get involved in other people’s business. Hank decides to tell Sonja himself but finds out she is letting Julian cheat because she doesn’t want to lose him.
Charlie (Evan Handler) is filming his porno investment at his own house. Marcy (Pamela Adlon) is supportive but mostly because it gives her the opportunity to snort snow with the cast. When the male lead is too coked up to film his scene, Charlie manfully steps in to take one for the team. Delicious Daisy (Carla Gallo) drops her robe to present her perky peaks for inspection. Those dainty dumplings are steaming hot!
After his break up with Karen (Natascha McElhone), Hank (David Duchovny) is back in the dumps, drinking all day and forgetting to pick his kid up at school. Charlie’s is not doing very well either; he is manning the phones at Marcy’s salon and arguing with his porn star client about her lack of work. He finally gets her a part in the porno “Vaginatown” by investing $100,000 of his own money into the production.
Hank’s landlord/biography subject Ashby (Callum Keith Rennie) tries to cheer Hank up with a visit from his favorite TV chef Chloe Metz (Meredith Monroe). Their meeting in the kitchen quickly moves to a meating in the bedroom. Perky quirky Chloe spills some weird dirty talk and her left love ladle as Hank bones her from behind. That’ll get your cream sauce boiling!
Hank (David Duchovny) and Karen (Natascha McElhone) are back together, which means he has to clean up his act by going on the nicotine patch and getting a vasectomy. Even with his chestnuts injured ,the ladies still want him and Hank manfully resists his vasectomy nurse and former fling Michelle (Michelle Lombardo) as she shows off her sucking skills on a popsicle.
The happy couple goes to a party where a stoned Karen lures Hank into an empty bedroom for a four-legged frolic, but he has run to the bathroom first to check on his stitches. On his way back he gets turned around and goes into the wrong darkened room where he only sees naked nippers on the bed before he starts munching. The woman, Destiny (Zita Vass), sits up and when he sees tit’s not Karen, Hank bolts out of the room. The ensuing chase ends up in the living room with jugs jiggling the whole way. Destiny accuses Hank of violating her with his mouth in front of the party with her bangers and bearded clam still out for a breather, then walks off with Ashby (Callum Keith Rennie) showing her breathtaking bubble butt. That streaker will make you stand up and cheer!
Charlie (Evan Handler) has moved in with Hank (David Duchovny) now that his wife Marcy (Pamela Adlon) only wants lesbo lovin’ from his secretary Dani (Rachel Miner). Dani has got way too much dirt on him for him to fire her and is secretly meeting with Mia (Madeline Zima) to discuss becoming her agent. Turns out Mia did not return Hank’s novel- she’s trying to pass it off as her own.
Hank and Charlie go to the gym, where they bump into ball-busting boxer Laura (Laura Niles). She agrees to meat with them later, but when they hook up she is much more interested in Hank than Charlie. Hank cuts out early to give Charlie a chance to pitch his woo on the lovely Laura only to be woken up a few hours later. Laura will only do the deed with Charlie if Hank is there too.
Helping a buddy out goes to a whole new level as Hank and Charlie daisy chain the lascivious Laura. She shows her heavyweight hooters and hind end as they give her the one-two punch. Unfortunately Marcy and Karen burst in as Laura has an explosive finish. You’ll be feeling those golden gloves below the belt!
Hank (David Duchovny) comes home from his father’s funeral and it turns out he spent his time away finishing his new novel. He gives the only copy to Karen (Natascha McElhone) for her to read but she feels it would be too intimate for her to be involved. When a bonus check from the movie arrives, Hank takes it to a Porsche dealership to check out a new ride. His skillful driving convinces the saleswoman (Brigitte Bako) to let him take her for a test drive too. She brings out her heaving hubcaps, unfortunately bra covered, as she gets hot rodded by Hank in the driver’s seat. That’ll get your engine revved up!
Karen returns the unread book to Hank but it is stolen along with his Porsche after he is carjacked. Seems like everything is lost until it’s revealed that Mia (Madeline Zima) secretly made a copy of the draft.
Charlie (Evan Handler) comes home to find that his wife Marcy (Pamela Adlon) has been secretly meating with his sexretary Dani (Rachel Miner). She tells him she is only interested in muff diving from now on. She’s stolen Charlie’s cake and she’s eaten it too!
Hank (David Duchovny) gets a call that his father, Al (Mark Margolis), has died. Instead of preparing for the funeral Hank decides to check into a hotel with a hooker. Working girl Trixie (Judy Greer) lets Hank snort blow off her lacy lingerie covered cheeks. You’ll want to cover that booty with your own white stuff!
As Hank remembers his father’s life it’s revealed where many of Hank’s personality traits come from. Hank’s father spent all his time chasing women and alcohol. On the last visit he took to California, Al told Hank he came to see his old girlfriend, the same one he had cheated on Hank’s mother with. This was also around the time that Hank started work on adapting his book to a movie, a move that eventually pulled him and Karen apart.
When Trixie's pimp shows up and demands money from Hank he calls Charlie (Evan Handler) to rescue him. Charlie drops him off with Karen and as she comforts him about his father’s death they fall into bed together. It’s just the thing Hank needed, and the next morning he boards a plane to the funeral.
Hank’s (David Duchovny) single again and he immediately meats a new girlie, Michelle (Michelle Lombardo), while shopping for groceries. Michelle's marvelously massive mams are bursting out of her bathing suit as she asks for wine advice.
They go back to his place for a roll in the hay. When Hank wakes up he finds that Michelle has left and taken his guitar and records with her. Worth it!
Hank meets up with Karen (Natascha McElhone) to watch Becca (Madeleine Martin) in a Battle of the Bands. Their nice family outing is ruined by Mia (Madeline Zima) calling to have Hank pick her up from her creepy writing teacher’s house.
Marcy (Pamela Adlon) catches Charlie (Evan Handler) ordering his secretary around and seems a little suspicious. Later Charlie tries to get her to engage in some S&M and it doesn’t go very well.
Hank and Karen get drunk and kiss but know they are wrong for each other. When Hank gets home Michelle shows up to return his guitar and records, and have a rehash romp. Michelle’s life preservers will have you putting the sex wax on your surfboard!
When business calls him out of town, Bill (Damian Young) asks Hank (David Duchovny) to step in and speak to Mia’s (Madeline Zima) school in his place. Meredith (Amy Price-Francis) storms off in a huff after Hank makes fun of her saying “LOL” out loud.
Hank gives a speech to Mia’s class urging them never to become writers, become anything else. Afterwards Hank spends a little time with Mia’s pervy teacher, who enjoys working at an all-girls school way too much.
Later that night Hank is a guest on Henry Rollins’ radio show talking about his newest book. He rants about internet slang like “LOL” and how it is killing the English language. Unfortunately Meredith is listening, and when he sees her afterwards she breaks up with him.
Marcy (Pamela Adlon) tries to seduce Charlie (Evan Handler) by offering up her mini muffin in tight black panties, but Charlie’s only has eyes for his ass-istant Dani.
Hank (David Duchovny) and Meredith (Amy Price-Francis) are still having fun in bed but she’s starting to want a little more commitment. She asks Hank to go to an out of town fundraiser with her; he agrees to go, but later finds out she was taking him to make a married man she’s humping jealous.
Karen (Natascha McElhone) and Bill (Damian Young) are also at the fundraiser. When Karen is bumped and insulted by a partygoer Bill does nothing but when Hank hears about it he punches the guy out.
Delicious Dani (Rachel Miner) continues her corruption of Charlie by stripping to her skivvies and stockings while he talks to his wife on the phone. She crawls to his desk to bring him some papers then later poses for photos being whipped until Hank walks in on them. That petite physique with have you whipping it out!
Hank (David Duchovny) has a book signing, but when the director who adapted his book for the big screen, Todd Carr (Chris Williams), shows up it quickly dissolves into fisticuffs. Hank heads out to a bar afterwards where he meets up with his previous blind date Meredith (Amy Price-Francis). They make up, which leads to the inevitable banging in Hanks bed.
Charlie (Evan Handler) impulsively fires his assistant Dani (Rachel Miner) after she brings him a regular coke instead of diet. She asks for her job back by sending her boss pictures of herself posing in a thong with her right niblet out. All is forgiven!
Hank and Meredith seem to be having a good time dating, as he helps her kidnap her dog back from an ex. When he accidentally grabs the wrong dog, he gives it to his daughter Becca (Madeleine Martin), who has been asking for one.
Sexy secretary Dani is back on the job and screwing up on purpose to gets some disciplinary action from Charlie. After she brings him the wrong coffee she lifts up her skirt to show her bitty bare buns for punishment. Those cute cheeks deserve a good spanking!
Hank (David Duchovny) continues to get more ass than a donkey stable as he gets a phone number from a woman (Brooke Banner) driving a convertible. After he calls her up she shows him her porn star pom poms and pork chops while she asks if she needs plastic surgery. Hank assures her she is perfect, but their getting down to business is interrupted by her screaming baby. Everybody want to nurse on those feeders!
Hank takes a job writing a blog for Hell-A magazine, which he later finds out is owned by Karen’s (Natascha McElhone) new boyfriend Bill (Damian Young). He heads over to Bill’s house to have dinner with the fam only to be confronted by Mia (Madeline Zima) in a string bikini coming out of the pool. That bikini biscuit will have you making gravy!
Karen has set Hank up with a blind date, Sonja (Paula Marshall), for the dinner party which of course he ruins with his big mouth. Mia and Sonja sit on either side of Hank at the table and compete over who gets to play pocket pool in his pants. When Mia leaves, Hank and Sonja smoke weed and she brings out her natural knockers and hind end for appraisal. Her perfect score earns a doggy style humping until Hank ends it by falling off the bed.
Hank (David Duchovny) has writers block. That’s what he tells Jesus as he chats with him in church. The conversation is interrupted by a naughty nun who offers Hank a hummer. Wait, What?? Turns out it’s all just a dream- Hank is in bed, being woken up by Heather (Michele Nordin) worshiping at his altar. Our prayers are answered as she flips over to show Hank her pert pencil tips while he returns the favor. Unfortunately they are interrupted by Heather’s husband coming home and chasing Hank off.
Hank picks up his daughter Becca (Madeleine Martin) from school, and when they get home she discovers Sandy Carr (Camille Langfield) naked in bed trying to surprise Hank. Sorry Sandy bares her boulders as she throws her clothes back on. No need to apologize for those beautiful butterbags!
Next up for Hank is a visit to a book store where he meets a fan, Mia (Madeline Zima), and does some heavy flirting. They head home where the mamtasic Mia rides Hank in bed and then punches him in the face. Those knobs are a knockout!
Becca's mom Karen (Natascha McElhone) picks her up and although it’s obvious she and Hank still have feelings for each other, she’s gotten engaged to someone else. Karen’s new boyfriend Bill (Damian Young) has a 16 year old daughter, who Hank is shocked to discover is Mia, his bookstore bang.
Hank’s agent, Charlie (Evan Handler), meets him at a bar and suggests a cure for his depression- more women! They head out on a double date which Hank screws up royally by just being his natural asshole self. As his date storms out the door Hank locks eyes with another girl (Alison Mei Lan) at the bar and ends up taking her home for some sausage stuffing. She shows off her bountiful bolt-ons while cowgirling up on Hank. Yee-Haw!
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