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“If you run a school,” suggests Days of the Year.com, “organize a day around National Bubble Gum Day, and use it to debunk some of the beliefs that surround bubble gum. For starters, it doesn’t stay in your system for seven years, and there’s no danger in swallowing it.”
Haven’t we all been saying that for years?!
And would it hurt you to send a card?
After all, blowing bubble gum has been practiced since early last century (below left), so face it (below right), the substance is likely to stick around for the slime being.
Bubble gum is so ingrained in the culture, that it’s cracked the Da Vinci Code and even the Star Wars canon {I mean, his name is ‘Chewy’}!
However, it seems like a galaxy far, far away when Susan Williams of Fresno {a woman, wouldn’t you know!} set the Guinness World Record in 1996 for “Largest Bubblegum Bubble Ever Blown” at 26 inches in diameter! And it’s, um, never been broken.
If that seems unbelievable … try on this Urban Dictionary definition for size: ‘BubbleGumFantasy.’
This bare blonde runs rings around most fantasy fellatio figures:
Hate to burst your bubble … but she pops before he does … so the guy isn’t gonna gum all over her face!
Now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s gargle a gaggle of gals who are not afraid to spew the glue.
The smallest … and seemingly most innocent … of these ‘Web Celebs’ is diminutive Darcie Belle—measuring a mere 5-foot-1 and weighing just 106 pounds. Her more than 24,000 followers flock to Twitter to hear 34-24-34 Darcie declare that “Boys are just like bubble gum, sweet in the beginning and dull at the end” {her caption on the post below left).
Once the bra comes off (above right), so do the gloves: “I came here to chew bubble gum and kick ass,” she tweeted, “and I’m all out of bubble gum.”
Though the 21-year-old from Provo, Utah calls herself “pansexual,” most admirers call hers “the perfect bubble butt.”
“The perfect bubble boobs” might apply to 36K Sarah Rae, a 27-year-old Philly filly who runs YesBoobs.com.
“So," she starts a typical interactive web show, “you wanna watch me blow bubbles while I play with my hugetits for you?” Yes, dad•gum•it!
“I’m dressed in pink lace lingerie,” narrates Lacy Luck, 26, during a live show from Texas, “chewing bubble gum and blowing bubbles.
“Big boobs (36DD) and big bubbles make a lovely combination!”
In another web session, Lacy lures lads with a contest: “Let’s play a bubble gum game. When I blow 5 good bubbles, I’ll take my top down and let you see my perfect breasts.
“The bubbles just keep getting bigger and bigger as we go along, popping all over my face and getting suckedback in for more topless bubble blowing.”
Until the popshot: “Mmmm. I have a big ole wad of gum in my mouth and I love to chew and blow! I tease and encourage you to stroke it, challenging you to ‘blow the big one’ before I do. You get to blow your wad as it explodes all over my face.”
“You asked me if I would do a bubble gum blowjob video,” recounts I Want Clips cam ‘Cougar’ Bliss, “but I was always shy when explaining that I had never really done it before. I mean, I know how to blow bubbles and I know how to do the other … but I have never thought about combining the two. Why in the world did I wait so long?” She’s now making up for lost time by offering a quartet …
… while taking about a quart in the kisser in the top right clip! “No script here,” 34G Bliss explains, “just you and I sitting around while I blow some big, shiny bubbles. I got a good bubble gum facial in this video and some ended up in my hair too.” For good measure.
“Yes—I do take a lot of requests,” Stacie states upfront, and especially enjoys “twisting and pulling on my extrabig horny nipples!” Seems she always needs something in her mouth.
Our last lady who loves “blowing” is 43-year-old Trixie Fontaine from Seattle—she went from being “a church pianist” to tickling her own ivories with “gum and cum.” In opening (wide) for her spinoff site, TrixieBlows.com, the bisexual brunette began: “Let’s pop the visual cherry on this blog with a sexy gum photo. It’s not a huge bubble, but I kind of like having my boobs bigger than the bubble I’m blowing.”
At 36-double D on a 5’3” frame, that’s hardly a tall order.
“I’ve got a thing for girls and bubble gum … and boobs,” Trixie tells. “And the way that my mouth looks SO much like a pussy and the gum splatters to make sticky pink messes.”
“I do like the anticipation and excitement of actually blowing a bubble bigger and bigger, not knowing when it will reach capacity and pop.”
And now we’ve come to the climax of our three-part blog … when the stars come out to play … and chomp like champs.
“For some celebs,” concludes All Women Talk.com, “bubble gum is as much an accessory as their perfectly applied cat eyes and Louboutin pump heels. Some—like Britney Spears—have always got a piece of gum in their mouth!” Unless it’s dribbling down her chin …
Here are our Delightful Dozen Dribblers—dames whose fame causes no shame when they blow with the best of them!
Starting with the supermodel whose spouse, Tom Brady, will be starting on Super Bowl Sunday in his quest to be the best ever:
GISELE BÜNDCHEN
DREW BARRYMORE
HEIDI KLUM
AUDRINAPATRIDGE
KRISTEN WIIG
SELENA GOMEZ
SAMANTHA FOX
KATY PERRY
CHLOË SEVIGNY
JESSICA ALBA
PINK
ISABELI FONTANA
The youngest Victoria’s Secret model ever, the Brazilian beauty brings us to theEND of the load.
Hope we’ve left you feeling ‘In the Pink.’
Please chew on this for a bit …
