This weekend in theaters, the new superhero flick I Am Number Four, the Liam Neeson thriller Unknown, and the supernatural spookfest Vanishing on Seventh Street offer up a combined total of no boobs, zero butts, and bupkus bush. But Mr. Skin can still tell you where to see the stars strip.
I Am Number Four
Glee babe Dianna Agron doesn't make her nude debut in the teenage superhero sci-fi flick I Am Number Four and neither does her co-star, Aussie babe Teresa Palmer. And the closest thing that Emily Wickersham, who also appears, has ever done to nudity is her underwear-clad performance as AJ's girlfriend on The Sopranos. the only actress in this movie who's ever stripped on screen is racktastic redhead Judith Hoag, who once flashed flesh on an episode of Carnivle. This movie is number four on a list of the top three films to see this weekend.
Also new in theaters this weekend, Inglorious Basterds beauty Diane Kruger and Mad Men's January Jones join Liam Neesen in Unknown. What's not unknown is the nudity content of this movie. It's a solid zero. So if you're jonesing for January, fast forward to the 37-minute mark of 2006's The Three Burials of Melquaides Estrada to see her slip her left nip. And if your luger wants some Kruger, check out the 2004 epic Troy, where she shows her Hellenic hoots and heinie 15 minutes in. This weekend, skip Unknown and get yourself a fun-bone!
Vanishing on Seventh Street
Out in select theaters this weekend, Brit babe Thandie Newton's clothes aren't vanishing as she co-stars in the new supernatural thriller Vanishing on Seventh Street, a supernatural thriller that has most of Detroit's population mysteriously disappearing after a blackout. It's no mystery why you'd want to disappear from Detroit, but I'm still puzzling over what happened to Thandie's desire to strip on screen. If you want to see Thandie bust out her big Newtons, check out her awesome full frontal and backal scene two hours and 28 minutes into the 1998 epic Beloved. Take a detour from Seventh Street and visit the intersection of Bush Avenue and Booby Boulevard.