The Sexy Adventures of Van Helsing (2004)

If shape-shifting evil spirits have the ability to come in all shapes and sizes, then all emissaries of hell should be required to walk around in the body of a sinfully constructed ageless female who has a penchant for shucking out of her clothes and chowing down below the waists of other similarly scintillating, libido-possessed ladies. Such seems to be the guiding principle of the creative forces responsible for The Sexy Adventures of Van Helsing (2004). Worse ideas have been met with greater acclaim, and every man of conscience who appreciates honest and open concupiscence should raise a hand in salute to this bloody-silly labor of lust.