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The Covenant

The Covenant (2006)

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Review

As Deep Blue Sea (1999) director Renny Harlin’s occult horror thriller The Covenant (2006) begins, five families in seventeenth-century New England vow to keep their powers as witches and warlocks a secret. But this one's not set in Salem, instead the film makes the switch to a little further up on the Massachusetts coast to the town of Ipswich. More than three centuries from the events of the opening, the descendants of the mystic pilgrims use their abilities to wreak havoc on an elite Massachusetts boarding school. Former male models Steven Strait, Taylor Kitsch, Chace Crawford, and Toby Hemingway star as the uniquely gifted teens who unleash a miasma of supernatural hurt on their classmates. But when a dead body appears on campus, they have to figure out if it was one of them, or one of the new students like Sarah (Laura Ramsey) and Chase (Sebastian Stan). Once they figure it out, it's a magical battle between some of the most supernaturally powerful families in Massachusetts! Wicked magical, kid! Filmed in the midst of the YA teen supernatural cinema craze, this one kept things PG-13 to attract the tween crowd. So while the warring warlocks demonstrate that they've got plenty of creepy crawly CGI tricks up his sleeve, we never see them use magic to get laid. Not that these preppy pretty boys would need to use any magic to get some vag on their dick! We do get a shot of Basia Jasinki's ass when she bends over and they do the classic, gust of wind to blow the skirt up move. What is this, Zapped (1982)? Jessica Lucas looks all sorts of nippy in a tank top talking to her undie wearing roomie, Laura Ramsey. But Laura pulls a little sleight of hand on us, using a body double for her shower scene. Dirty move not letting us see you get clean, Jess! Put us down for a love spell if it means a spell in the sheets with women as hot as those in The Covenant