Mallrats (1995)

One year after Clerks (1994) made him an Indie darling, the hockey jersey wearing, Degrassi loving director Kevin Smith hit the big screen with his first major motion picture. Smith ditched the black and white aesthetic but returned both behind the screen as the writer/director, and in front of it as the stoned slacker Silent Bob, in his Clerks prequel, Mallrats (1995). Freshly dumped college kid T.S. Quint (Jeremy London) and his freshly dumped buddy Brodie (Jason Lee) decide to take their minds off their loneliness by hanging out at the local mall. Things don't work out, though, since before they can hit up Orange Julius, T.S. learns his ex is a contestant on a dating show taking place there. Looking to win his girl back, he decides to do whatever he can to make sure that doesn't happen. To bring down the dating show, our down on his luck hero will have to use everything he has at his disposal at the mall, from the stoner duo Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) to a horny young high school nonfiction writer (Renee Humphrey), and even Marvel legend Stan Lee. Yes, this movie stars a not-yet-famous Ben Affleck, but the real stars of the picture are the bared breasts of Priscilla Barnes, who's no stranger to big-screen nudity, as in The Devil's Rejects (2005), and small screen titillation, as in Three's Company. Priscilla plays a fortune teller who uses her jugs, including one with a double nipple, to see the future. We see a huge hard-on in your future after watching that scene! Less explicit is Joey Lauren Adams, of the squeaky voice and squeaky-clean mimi-mams, who's flashed her finery before but never as nice as here. After seeing them on display as she changes in a clothing store changing room, there'll be a clean up in aisle one! Internet shopping might be killing malls, but you can still drain your balls to the ladies in Mallrats!