Hanzo the Razor 3 (1974)

One simple fact of human physiology is that a man cannot achieve an erection without blood pumping. It is no wonder that the priapic and prodigiously endowed hero of Hanzo the Razor 3: Who’s Got the Gold? (1974) has no problem keeping it up. As in the first two Hanzo installments, the hot red stuff flows with abandon, as is to be expected in a film that follows the full-color exploits of a sword-swinging samurai vigilante. The distinguishing kink of the Hanzo series is the hero’s gigantic and unbeatable schlong, a granite-like outcropping that plays as important a role in subduing the evil as does the samurai’s flame-tempered blade. In the land of Hanzo, there is no such thing as an inopportune erection.