Girl on the Third Floor (2019)

Girl on the Third Floor proves yet again that although murder houses are an incredible deal on the open real estate market, they prove to be bad investments and not just because of all the tuckpointing and plumbing repairs that need to be made.  The walls are going to bleed, the pipes are going to leak a milky substance, and when the ceiling inevitably collapses, you're going to have to paint over all the creepy children's drawings AS WELL AS repair the collapsed ceiling itself!  Troubled ex-lawyer Don Koch (C.M. Punk) just looks past all that and decides to buy the house anyway with the intent to fix it up for him and his pregnant wife to start a new life together outside of the city and away from his past transgressions.  When he moves there ahead of her to start the project, he has one sexy neighbor try to warn him about the house and yet another sexy neighbor offers herself up to him!  Can this jilted barrister get past the complications of a home renovation AND a haunted house with a dark past?  Are these foxy neighbors actually there to help or hurt him and his family?  Can C.M. Punk chokeslam these spirits out of his future family home before it's too late???  Along the way, as you watch this wrestling icon fall deeper and deeper into this thriller, you get some tasty and tantalizing side boob from Sarah Brooks and a fantastic flash from Liz Koch (Trieste Kelly Dunn) to her husband over facetime.  Lastly, you get a monster girl with a mangled face (Tonya Kay) wearing not much other than a bedsheet wrapped around her body.  This horror flick delivers on the scares and will definitely make you stare at the lovely ladies leading this new homeowner into his descent into the dark!