Who's the Boss?

This is one of those shows that most likely everyone who was alive in the 80’s has seen--and some of us are still emotionally scarred because of it.. This sappy, cutesy fluff sitcom starred Tony Danza, who went from driving a hack on Taxi to merely being one on this show. Danza played Tony Micelli, a nice-guy housekeeper for hatchet-faced rich bitch career-woman Angela Bauer (Judith Light). Tony and his daughter Samantha (Alyssa Milano) must live with Angela, her son Jonathon, and her man-crazy mother Mona (Katherine Helmond). Naturally, One of the running themes of the show was the evolving relationship between Tony and Angela, who took eight years to finally get around to bumping uglies. Unless you were under the age of sixteen or the I.Q. of sixty, chances are you’d find this about as funny as Schindler’s List. Many of us doubtless had the kid sister who insisted on watching it, while big bro ran screaming from the room with ears covered as the dreadful theme song started playing. However, Who’s the Boss? is not without it’s redeeming points--six of them to be exact. The first two belong to co-star Nicole Eggert, who quickly shucked her bra and got down to showbooty business in Blown Away. This vivacious blonde has a very pert set of spongecakes--no silicone required or desired here! Two more of those redeeming points belong to Kate Vernon. This lovely blonde has been naked in all kinds of movies but did some of her best work in Dangerous Touch, where she had some sex in the back of a car, followed by a sapphic skinterlude with gorgeous softcore starlet Monique Parent. However, the final two redeeming points and the ones that made this whole Who’s the Boss? debacle worth it, is Mr. Skin Hall of Famer and child-actress turned nudity demi-goddess Alyssa Milano. Alyssa, with her raven hair, olive skin, piercing eyes, rock-hard body, and full, firm milkskins is--well, quite frankly she’s the reason that Vaseline and the pause button on the remote control were invented. Tony’s little girl grew up and out in all the right ways and has blessed us in plenty of B-movie skinathons. Hell, even those “1-800-Collect” commercials where she plays the leather-clad “Eva Savealot” are wank-worthy! This girl is a god damn dynamo! Who’s the Boss? More like who’s the slut? Girlfriend can’t stop getting naked! However, her crowning contribution to the united testicular pressure relief fund took place in Embrace of the Vampire. We’re talking nude photo shoots, lesbian experimentation, and a glorious softcore gangbang scene. Lovely Alyssa really went the extra mile in this one and managed to squeeze an extra six inches out of any fortunate soul who saw it. Viva la Milano!