Weiszel Tov!
Mr. Skin Salutes: Rachel Weisz
With a last name that rhymes with "vice", it's no great mystery that silken-maned, dewy-skinned enchantress Rachel Weisz is a habit that the denizens of Skin Central can't seem to break. But consider her phenomenal udderly natural figure, hypnotically exotic face, and beautiful mind and ask yourself: why wean yourself off an addiction this deliciously intoxicating?
"People find out I'm an actress and I see that 'whore' look flicker across their eyes," Rachel recently remarked, and though her vocation may be thought by some as undignified, make no mistakeRachel's one classy lassie. She was born and raised in a Jewish household in London, the oldest of two daughters born to an Austrian psychiatrist mother and a Hungarian father who invented a device that detects land minds. The breast thing he invented, however, remains Rachel, who, with her mysterious dark looks, earned extra cash modeling at the age of fourteen.
Hard Facts
Rachel's brains blossomed as big as her bountiful, bouncy-ful bosom did, and she entered prestigious Cambridge University to study English. After casually appearing in a few college plays, however, she became obsessed with acting and formed her own theater group, called Talking Tongues.
She certainly got tongues talkingnot to mention droolingin 1991 with one of her earliest professional roles in the UK television drama Advocates. The show may have been little seen, but that's one description that couldn't be used for Rachel's role. She appeared in a bathtub, her English roses blooming above the surface of the water. Steamy and seamy!
Throughout the early 1990s, Rachel honed her thespian skills on the English boob tube, which has long enjoyed a deserved reputation for being gratuitously generous with the Brit tits. In the mini-series Scarlet Black (1993), Rachel served up squatter and rack (Picture: 1) while letting Star Wars actor Ewan McGregor slip her some light saber.
And Weisz was awfully nicz in one of her first big-screen roles. In Stealing Beauty (1996) (Picture: 1, 2), she was a peeling beauty, sending audiences reeling with her boobies. She nearly stole the picture out from under star Liv Tyler when she shed her threads and toasted her topless torso tarts poolside. Want some man milk for those crumpets, Rachel?
As her star rose, so her clothing fell. In the crime drama I Want You (1998)arguably her best movie for nudityRach's London britches were falling down all over the place! As the aptly named Helen, she was the object of desire for two men (Picture: 1) and a young boy, all of whom could not resist her wicked wiles. And viewers could not resist her three B's, as Rachel peeled off and revealed her tasty triangle tangle on film. How'd you like to swim in that English channel?
Rachel fans didn't have to wait long to grow long, since she nakedly graced theater screens once more a mere year later. Sunshine (1999) depicts the fall of the Austro-Hungarian empire, and it also depicted the falling of Ms. Weisz's clothing. While slipping between the sheets with her disgustingly lucky paramour, she gave a fleeting peek at her peaks. In Sunshine, Rachel got to explore her Hungarian roots, and audiences got to explore Rachel's hoots. Everybody wins!
That same year marked her deserved breakthrough into mainstream superstardom when she played the romantic foil to Brendan Fraser's archaeologist hero in the big-budget blockbuster The Mummy (1999). The harsh shooting conditions, physically demanding role, and brutally arid climate appealed to the equally hot Rachel, who, despite her groin-tinglingly gorgeous looks, would never consider herself a glamour girl. She mused, "If I went out in killer heels and full makeup, blow dry, the whole thing, anyone dressed up like that could be intimidating to men and women, really. It's so 'look at me.'"
And look at her we did, especially when she was in the buff. She more than made up for not unwrapping in The Mummy with skinful turns in Beautiful Creatures (2000) and Enemy at the Gates (2001). "There was dirt under your nails and in your ears and up your bumwe got into it!" a cheerful Rachel laughed about her role in the latter. Viewers might want to examine said bum for traces of grime, since she daintily doffed her duds and donated her derriere (Picture: 1) to the plot. Now that's what Mr. Skin calls a breathtaking view of the White Cliffs of Bend-over!
Now a bona fide bigwig at the box office, Rach pumped out a ton of non-nude flicksincluding the sequel The Mummy Returns (2001) in the beginning of the decade, inciting fans of her natural knockerage to twiddle their thumbs and laps with impatience. Luckily she returned to (naked) form with The Constant Gardener (2005). It's easy to see why the mega-talented Rachel won an Oscar for her work in the film, since you'll be polishing your own bald-headed statue when you see her in little more than a fake pregnancy belly, the camera caressing her curves as she dunks her dairy dirigibles and duff into a tub (Picture: 1).
No phony fetus was needed in Rachel's real lifeshe became an actual Mummy in May of 2006 when she and director boyfriend Darren Aronofsky welcomed son Henry Chance. Motherhood hasn't slowed down our heavy-hootered heroine any, and she has countless cinematic projects in the pipeline for the coming year. Hopefully they'll be skinematic as well, because when it comes to shedding threads for the sake of art, the Weisz is tight!
