Gone Too Soon: Mamorial Day Top 10
Gone Too Soon: Mamorial Day Top 10
Phoebe Cates’s other great ’80s teen sex comedy also
If summertime 1982 served as cherry-popping Ground Zero for the decade’s teen sex comedy phenomenon—and seeing as it contained the premieres of Porky's, The Last American Virgin, and Fast Times at Ridgemont High, it did—then the subsequent swelter season’s Private School (1983) was the first direct fallout. And what a gloriously radiant after-effect it is.
To be sure, a spate of raunchy teen farces did rush into theaters during the ’82-’83 school year—among them: The Beach Girls, Homework, Joysticks, Losin’ It, Goin’ All the Way, My Tutor, Pink Motel,
Spring Break, (the mighty) Screwballs, and (the also mighty) Zapped!
But Private School represented Hollywood’s first full-scale attempt to concoct an all-out teen sex comedy blockbuster, calculatedly combining familiar genre tropes (nerds, jocks, nudity-producing pranks, cross-dressing one’s way into the girls’ shower room, etc.), and then adding Phoebe Cates—the naked girl from Fast Times—up on top like a beautiful, brown-nippled bow.

Things that make you go boi-i-i-ng: this week’s theme is the inventive employment of grotesque rubber appendages in the service of one-of-a-kind, whacked-out sexploitation chestnuts.
Sex in the Comics (1973), fresh on DVD from Just for the Hell of It video, freakily brings ancient funny-paper characters to life with live humans donning psychotic-episode-inducing latex masks, unnerving editing techniques, limp dicks, unsuckled bosoms, and authentically insane concepts of eroticism.
From Troma DVD comes Getting Lucky (1990), the legendary Green Magic adventure half-remembered by viewers of USA Up All Night in which a leprechaun in a beer bottle shrinks a nerd so small he can – and does – get lost in a cheerleaders’ pubic hair.
Go. Bounce along now. Read.

Code Red DVD does right by the once-lost '80s teen sex classic Hot Moves!
L.A.'s UltraStar Studio plays host to art-damaged Third Reich ravishers!
IronBabe's Jackie Stevens steps in and strips down for Misty Mundae -- electrifyingly elongated-nipples-first!
And Return to Sleepaway Camp may herald a renaissance of weird, haunting, unsanitary sexual amusements from a quarter-century ago coming back to bite us in (the front of) the pants.
Click on Das Boobs for the (w)hole truth.
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