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The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human

The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human (1999)

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Review

he Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human (1999) is a mockumentary that examines humanity's horny side, as observed by aliens trying to figure us out. Like a Discovery Channel doc, it's narrated in an academic, dry tone by super-intelligent spaceman Infinity-cubed (David Hyde Pierce), who also puts in an onscreen appearance as an E.T. This extraterrestrial take on sexin' terrestrials follows Samwise's brother Mackenzie Astin as Billy, the nerdy fella who meets, bones, impregnates, and eventually marries the free spirited, big tittied babe Jenny (Carmen Electra). From first hooking up at a nightclub, to the initial sex session, all the way to Jenny popping out the baby, deadpan Dave misunderstands nearly everything that goes on, humorously misinterpreting actions that any Earthbound human will easily understand. What we can't understand is how an average Joe like Mackenzie ended up with a sex goddess like Carmen Electra. She's electric when she puts her clothes over her bra, in the hottest scene of clothes getting put on, ever put to screen. That cleavage will have you craving beavage! But since everyone on Earth wanted to see the tits for real, it was bound to happen. So, we see her cans for real as the two do the deed, complete with some hilarious background music reminiscent of the stuff you see on Animal Planet shows. Then we watch her ride on top of him, with the narrator talking about the birth control Jenny's using. Finally, we see her jugs as she jumps on top of Mackenzie naked, as the two opt to go birth control free and see how that works. No blocking, just p in v cocking! That's how the real mating happens! Our horny habits might not be that hard to understand, but you'll be rock hard with it in your hand watching Carmen manhandle some unworthy man in The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human!