Girls in
The Erotic Adventures of Pinocchio (1971)

3-D Movies are mounting a comeback. Again. Be still, my bleeding eyes. Again.

At age 7, I stumbled upon the famous photograph of a movie theater audience staring up, enraptured, at Bwana Devil (1953) through paper eyeglasses with colored lenses.

Some nearby authority figure explained to me that those people were watching a 3-D movie, and those glasses enabled the images to jump right off the screen.

The immediate, flawlessly logical question I blurted out then was: “So why isn’t every movie in 3-D?” Nobody could explain it to me.

Seven was also the age when I happened up Pops McBeardo’s Playboy stashed in the bathroom hamper, so my unspoken query was: “And why isn’t Playboy in 3-D? And what about dirty movies?” The answers would come. As would I.

Things that make you go boi-i-i-ng: this week’s theme is the inventive employment of grotesque rubber appendages in the service of one-of-a-kind, whacked-out sexploitation chestnuts.

Sex in the Comics (1973), fresh on DVD from Just for the Hell of It video, freakily brings ancient funny-paper characters to life with live humans donning psychotic-episode-inducing latex masks, unnerving editing techniques, limp dicks, unsuckled bosoms, and authentically insane concepts of eroticism.

From Troma DVD comes Getting Lucky (1990), the legendary Green Magic adventure half-remembered by viewers of USA Up All Night in which a leprechaun in a beer bottle shrinks a nerd so small he can – and does – get lost in a cheerleaders’ pubic hair.

Go. Bounce along now. Read.

One of the most popular softcore smashes of all time, Flesh Gordon rocketed into neighborhood theaters across the country on this date in 1974.

Upon touching down in local cinemas, the sexually explicit, cosmically comical Flesh Gordon ran continuously for more than a year.

It then became a reliable re-release and a smash in the fledgling days of home video, before living on as a midnight movie favorite--where Flesh continues to circulate (and titillate) today.

For more on innocent entertainment gone orgasmically orbital during the me(at) decade, launch your rocket after the jump.