Premium cable is great. It takes us to exotic locales like ancient Rome (Spartacus), Renaissance Italy (The Borgias), the mythical lands of Camelot and Westeros (Game of Thrones), and even the fabled kingdom of Hollywood (Californication, Entourage), and it shows us boobs in every last one of them.

Now prepare to erect a pyramid in your pants with the Aztec invasion of Conquest, the new Showtime series currently being developed by On the Road (2012) scribe Jose Rivera and Mr. "Don't call me Opie" himself, Ron Howard.Conquest is being described as a "sweeping period drama" that will depict the fall of the Aztec empire in the 16th century-- so like Apocalypto (and yes, we know that was the Maya, not the Aztecs), but stretched out over 12 or 13 episodes. Deadline describes the show like so:

"Filled with blood, lust, gold, magic and mythology, Conquest is...'a classic war story about two powerful men and their people ultimately leading to the destruction of the Aztec culture and the men themselves.'"

In other words, we need to start working on our Aztec puns. What rhymes with "Quetzalcoatl"?

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