Girls in
Saturday Night Live (1975-????)

Sly Fox Speaks

We realize that many of our regular readers have grown semi-disgusted with Megan Fox lately. Sure, she's probably the most gorgeous and sexually provocative starlet out there, but her "tease and never reveal" way of manipulating us is maddening! She's never so much as hinted at a half-moon of areola!

But she's still Megan Fox, and she's still volcano-hot, and her new interview in The New York Times is chock full of juicy quotes.

After all, we know better than to expect Megan Fox nudity, but she's always good for some fantasy-worthy sound bites!

Lap up her sex talk under the cut.

Magazine’s Male Readership Hits a New High of 27

Promoting their new movie Whip It, due out October 9, Drew Barrymore and Ellen Page appeared together in Marie Claire wearing roller skates and short shorts.

Besides a photo of Drew going crotch to ass with the sexually amorphous 22-year-old in a bending over position, the magazine also features a shot of the pair engaged in a steamy lesbian makeout session.

Ever since her convincing portrayal of a newly-initiated Sapphist on Saturday Night Live and her almost non-stop lesbian-like behavior, rumors have swirled about whether the Juno star shares more with Ellen DeGeneres than just a first name.

Yesterday, we covered Ellen DeGeneres living out her fantasies on screen with Sharon Stone back in 2000. And we all know that openly bisexual Angelina Jolie was at the set early every day she got to spend naked with Elizabeth Mitchell on Gia.

So here’s hoping that Ms. Page follows suit, naked, on camera, with Drew Barrymore.

If, that is, she's into girls, which is far from clear.

Read more after the jump.

Mr Skin’s Skintastic Summer Movie Guide 2009

Where to see Hollywood’s blockbuster girls of summer without their swimsuits on.

As Memorial Day looms with beach openings, first-of-the-season barbecues, and long-awaited hot weather, so too do Hollywood’s biggest, loudest, most slam-bangingly awesome summer movie blockbusters.

And, just like everyone else, Mr Skin can hardly wait.

Each year, it seems as though the studios unleash their top-ticket titles earlier than ever. So far in 2009 we’ve already seen Star Trek, Angels & Demons, and X-Men Origins: Wolverine. But the best and the barest still lie ahead.

Join Mr Skin now for a unique spin on a typical summer movie guide.

Most media outlets will tell you what films are coming out, who spent how much on what, and how much stuff gets blown up in spectacular fashion.

But Mr Skin casts his expert eye on the stunning starlets of 2009’s summer movies, pointing out who gets nude in which titles and, in case they’re keeping covered or more skinvestigation is necessary, where to find each sexy celebrity nude in previous releases.

Mr Skin’s Skintastic Summer Movie Guide 2009 is your go-to resource not only to see what’s playing over the course of the swelter months, but where to find the really hot stuff—namely, Jessica Biel nude, Amy Adams nude, Katherine Heigl nude, Maggie Gyllenhaal nude, Evan Rachel Wood nude, Rachel McAdams nude, Milla Jovovich nude, Alison Lohman nude, Penélope Cruz nude, and all other 2009 summer movie celebs nude.

Surf’s up and bikinis are off! Now let Mr Skin be your guide!

Mr. Mike Hits DVD, but Does Mr. Bill Get Raped? Oh, Nooo!

In 1979, Michael O’Donoghue, legendary National Lampoon editor and Saturday Night Live’s original head writer, created one of the goddamndest things ever intended for network television broadcast: Mr. Mike’s Mondo Video.

A parody of 1960s’ Italian-made globetrotting shockumentaries (Mondo Cane, Africa Addio) that examined outrageous human beliefs and behaviors, NBC commissioned O’Donoghue to create Mondo Video as a pilot to be an occasional fill-in for Saturday Night Live.

Suffice to say, the finished hodgepodge of splatter gags, wet cats, Sid Vicious, ancient porn, and other eye-poppers never made it to the air. Instead, producer Lorne Michaels released Mondo Video to theaters with the tagline “The TV Show That Can’t Be Shown on TV”, accompanied by a “special” Mr. Bill Show.

Shout! Factory just issued Mr. Mike’s Mondo Video on DVD, minus Mr. Bill. I’m glad to have the show on disc, but I really, really need to know the truth about that Mr. Bill short.

Here’s why: back in ’79, a kid I knew claimed to have seen Mondo Video in a theater, and he told me that the “special” Mr. Bill Show consisted of Mr. Hand greasing up Sluggo’s big, black cock with Vaseline, and then Sluggo barbarically raping Mr Bill in the ass.

Could it be that that young rapscallion was fibbing?

Toni Colette, Rosario Dawson, and Nicolette Sheridan Get Sexy on TV over the Weekend

Last night was the first episode of the sixth and final season of Showtime’s leztastic drama The L Word. The show featured the topless teats of Kate French as she mashes mouths and muffs with her lady Mia Kirshner, who is unfortunately wearing a bra most of the time. Happily, Mia does briefly flash her leftie in a post-sex Sapphic snuggle.

Although this is the last season of The L Word, there are plans for a spin-off show featuring Leisha Hailey locked up in prison with Famke Janssen.

The news has stores nationwide braced for a run on Kleenex and hand lotion.

More after the cut.

Nora Louise Kuzma a.k.a. Traci Lords was the biggest, hottest, sexiest porn star and and most singularly searing X-rated carnal fixation of Youngman McBeardo’s put-upon puberty years.

It was unbelievably cool, then, when both The Object of Affection and The Objectional Erection turned out to have been born right about the exact same time.

Of course, the scandal of Traci Lords performing in hardcore porn films when she should have been in high-school nearly capsized the entire adult-entertainment industry, but it created a Legend of Lust to endure eternally for the (under)ages.

X-Rated Ambition: The Traci Lords Story, a new UK documentary available from Shocking Videos exposes the dirty truth about Traci (McBeardo’s is self-explanatory). Click for the box cover for the E-cup-normous, up-turned scoops.

“To-ga! To-ga! To-ga!”

That classic party-whoop, along with so many others, is just one of a myriad of reasons to love the all-time comedy classic Animal House, which first turned theaters into wild fraternity blow-outs on this day in 1978.

That's exactly 30 years ago!

Get the full skinny on Animal House after the jump!

“I like big butts and I cannot lie,” rhapsodized Sir Mix-A-Lot in “Baby Got Back,” his 1992 smash single that simply cannot be overlooked when composing a paean to the limitless pleasures of lusciously large-scaled female posteriors.

Of course, legendary metal mavens Spinal Tap had already kicked open that back door lyrically via their opus “Big Bottom,” which declares: “The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin’ / The looser the waistband / the deeper the quicksand / My love gun's loaded and she's in my sights / Big game's waiting there inside her tights!”