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Painkiller Jane

Painkiller Jane (2005-2007)

Brief Nudity
  • Genres: Sci-fi
  • Created by: Gil Grant
  • Home Release: 03/25/2008
  • Network: SCIFI, Global TV
  • Country: Canada, USA
  • Buy on Amazon >>

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Review

Four years after her killer turn as the villain in Terminator 3 (2003), the smokin' Kristanna Loken reasserts her place as science-fiction's reigning kick-ass super siren in Painkiller Jane. Based off a comic book from the 90's, this high-octane action series is spun off from a 2005 Sci-fi Channel movie that had Emmanuelle Vaugier playing the title role. On the show, however, Kristanna was the titular Jane Vasco, a DEA agent that sees a dude doing some seriously supernatural stuff during a drug bust. Sort of like in Men in Black (1997), the way she handles herself in that sticky situation leads to her being recruited by a special government agency who deals with criminals called "neuros," who have special powers like telepathy, fire generation, and telekinesis. But along the way, Jane discovers that she's also enhanced, and can hyper-rapidly recover from any injury, although she still feels the injury's pain. Investigating the source of her powers, Jane hooks up with other fellow genetic mutants while taking down all sorts of paranormal no-goodniks. The best way to ease pain is to take your mind off it, and the best way to do that is by watching girls take their clothes off. To that end, there's not a ton to work with on this Sci-fi Channel original, though we do see Moneca Delain causing some dude  a ton of pain by teasing him in a bra and panties until his boss calls and as bad as he wants to make it, he's gotta take it. Ildiko Ferenczi had our dick in a frenzy thanks to some bikini looks at her body, but it was Miss Loken that really had us going loco! Watching Kristana Loken in tight costumes run, jump, and wrestle baddies is all the painkiller you'll ever need. But what really had us throbbing was a shot of sideboob as a lucky doctor checks out all the cuts on her back. Looks like Painkiller Jane needs some sexual healing, to us!