Blog Posts about Natalie Portman

We here at Skin Central have a confession to make. We have failed you. It turns out that May is National Masturbation Month, a faptastic celebration of acts of self-love that we only found out about yesterday. True, every month is Masturbation Month here at Mr. Skin, but Dr. Joycelyn Elders was fired as Attorney General in May 1995 for saying masturbation is fun and something something.

Anyway, we really ought to have been at the vanguard of this masturbation celebration- the comics uber-nerds camped out for days to be the first ones to see The Avengers, and thus should we have been the first to tell you you are encouraged, nay, obligated, to jerk off more than usual in May.

But it's not too late! In penance, we humbly offer up Mr. Skin's Masturbation Scenes playlist, featuring starlets like Natalie Portman and Shannon Elizabeth flicking the bean as well as edgy Euro babes like Lou Charmelle (above) and Elena Anaya giving themselves real lube jobs with vibrators and dildos.

So grab your lucky sock and some lube, fire up the monitor, turn off your phone, and celebrate. Happy masturbating!

Doesn’t anybody knock anymore? Just kidding. We love catching babes in the act of self-pleasure, especially sexy spelunkers like Natalie Portman and Elena Anaya. So share the thrills of the self-jacking Jills on our Top 10 Female Masturbation Scenes.

We've been asking "Who's Hotter?" all this month at Mr. Skin's Whack-It Bracket, but now that March is coming to an end and all the Madness that comes with it, we have a new (but related) question for you:

"Who's the HOTTEST?"

We've reached our final round, and petite brunette Mila Kunis is facing off against busty blonde Scarlett Johansson; but while these two go together like chocolate and peanut butter or lube and tube socks, in the end, there can only be one.

More after the jump!

We've reached a new round here at the Mr. Skin Whack-It Bracket, and while we only got it half-right (How about that Emmy Rossum upset in the Chesty C-Cups division?!) in our last round of predictions, that only makes it more fun.

We've reached the Sexy 16, and now that the competition is heating up we're narrowing the voting window, so be sure to VOTE before Sunday, March 25 when we move on to our Enticing 8.

And to kick off this battle of the TIT-ans, we've got two viewer favorites from our A-Cup All Stars division: It's Natalie Portman Vs. Kristen Bell after the jump!

OK guys, who’s hotter: Penelope Cruz or Emmy Rossum?

Now you can make your voice heard as Mr. Skin pits these sexy stars (and many, many more!) against each other in Mr. Skin's Whack-It Bracket. We’ve seeded 64 of the hottest celebs on Mr. Skin into 4 divisions divided by cup size:

A-Cup All Stars: Natalie Portman, Keira Knightley, AnnaLynne McCord and more

B-Cup Beauties: Amber Heard, Olivia Munn, Jessica Alba and more

Chesty C-Cups: Anne Hathaway, Amanda Seyfried, Emmanuelle Chriqui and more

and Heavy Handfuls: Christina Hendricks, Sofia Vergara, Kate Upton and more

...and it’s up to you to VOTE on which star’s sex appeal reigns supreme. We've got a titillating clip from each star on our Whack-It Bracket page, and after viewing the clips, you can cast your vote on which chick deserves to go to the next round.

Starting today, March 13, every five days we’ll start a new round, going from our Sexy 16 to the Enticing 8 to the Foxy 4 until you, the voters, have determined Mr. Skin’s single sexiest celeb. Plus, every vote enters you to WIN an iPad3 and other awesome prizes...and did we mention it's FREE? Madness!

So check out Mr. Skin's Whack-It Bracket now...we provide the tournament, you provide the seed.

Whether or not you agree with these Gentlemen's assessment of Valentines' Day, the fact remains that that annual cavalcade of culturally-mandated romance is almost upon us.

And while a fancy French dinner by candlelight sounds pretty romantic, don't forget that by the time she finishes that third glass of wine and you make it back home, it'll be sleepy time, not sexy time.

So we suggest that this year, you stay home and make a nice dinner for the two of you (be sure to remind her it's the thought that counts if you're clueless in the kitchen) before settling in for one of those "chick flicks" you usually hate. That way you'll be close to the bedroom when those amorous urges strike, and look like a thoughtful dude to boot.

What she doesn't need to know is that these "chick flicks" are all Mr. Skin-approved for maximum ogling potential...just don't get caught with your jaw on the floor, ok?

See Skin Central's V-Day recommendations after the jump!

Mr. Skin's Blu-ray Ninja never rests in his quest to flush out nudity wherever it may hide, and in 2011 he answered your burning nude questions (Sigourney Weaver in Ghostbusters? sorry fellas, no dice), picked up on pubes in the most shadowy scenes, and discovered sexy skin in the UN-likeliest of places.

Slice through our Top 5 HD discoveries of 2011 after the jump!

Tits the season!

Whether you've been naughty or nice, Skinta Claus is coming to town to deliver his top 10 Christmas-themed nudes straight down your chimney, so get ready to unwrap Natalie Portman's nip, Gretchen Mol's mams, and much, much more.