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‘On June 16, 2016 the American Public Transportation Association (APTA) and public transportation systems across the country will celebrate the 11th Annual National Dump the Pump Day,” reads APTA’s new press release.

“With the continued fluctuation of gas prices {expected to rise this week}, everyone is looking for a way to save to money. National Dump the Pump Day encourages people to ride public transportation instead of driving”… and promotes the cause with a rigid red vehicle entering a bright tight hole.

“The gas station is one of America’s most evocative symbols,” notes Britain’s Independent newspaper. “They take on the qualities of their historical moment: they tell us about America’s relationship with the car, with travel, with consumption.” And it’s conspicuous that we seem consumed with comely cuties handling the hose! (in the early 1950s and ’60s, below).

Our obsession with pumping continued into the Seventies—reaching a fever pitch during the Gas Crisis of 1979-80…which spawned a pair of films to ease the tension through titillation. The first was June 1979’s Gas Pump Girls, in which “June and her friends take over a service station formerly run by her uncle. They perform every trick in the book to attract customers.” The role of June marked the movie debut of buxom blonde Kirsten Baker, who suggestively held the hose to her nose and went topless at her graduation to draw attention to their petrol palace.

Baker became a cult legend, but disappeared shortly thereafter. Ironically, the icon from Gas Pump Girls was arrested five times in 2002-3 alone for driving under the influence.

Next up was September 1980’s High Test Girls, the U.S. title of the Swiss film Sechs Schwedinnen von der Tankstelle in which, as the Mr. Skin review notes: “The six tit-ular Swedish sisters working at a gas station prime the customers’ pumps, check their dipsticks, and give everyone a good look under their hoods. Check out French porn and horror legend Brigitte Lahaie’s numerous full-frontal scenes.” (She’s the lady in red in the poster and posing below.)

Clearly, the imagery of attractive women fondling phallic-shaped fuel nozzles and inserting them in round receptacles has long been an erotic emblem to American audiences—often reflected in the names of the pit stops themselves. Witness this early 1900s service station with its barely disguised Skinnuendo:

The name game continues to this day—prompting one observer to ask on Twitter: “What is with the sexual innuendo gas stations? Are they oblivious or just ballsy?”

In the time it takes to say, “Fill Her Up!,” Sleuth has found a number of national chains that give new meaning to the question, “Rotate Your Tires?” Among these are Kum and Go, with 422 locations in 17 states …

… the one-stop convenience of Pump N Munch, started in Minneapolis and now with 13 stores in 6 states offering more than mere ‘lip’ service …

…while even more blatant is fast-growing BJ’s Gas, located on the East Coast and going down to North Carolina—whose sales slogan is to check out their ‘Extra Long Hoses.’

Little wonder the Harris Poll recently ranked BJ’s 5th in the nation in terms of ‘Strongest Gasoline Brands!’

And who can forget the combination of legendary Mr. Lubrication in Seaside, California coupled with Betty Beavers Fuel Stop in upstate New York?

Inevitably, one man’s lubrication and a couple of busy beavers came together in Sleuth’s hometown of Washington, DC late last year. As the New York Daily News reported: “District police have arrested a woman after she was allegedly caught on video with a friend giving a man an unwanted twerkout inside a gas station.”

Another news source elaborated: “The unidentified victim says the sexual abuse started when two women flashed him their bare breasts while he was pumping gas on Oct. 7. While in the checkout line, police say one woman began rubbing her buttocks against the man’s crotch.”

“The victim tried to back away, but the abuse continued, as seen in the surveillance video released on Nov. 8 {Sleuth’s wife’s birthday…and no, she wasn’t involved}. A second woman then grabbed the victim’s groin and buttocks multiple times in a very aggressive manner, authorities say.”

The duo caught on tape were Ayanna Marie Knight, age 22 {the grinder, below left} and 23-year-old Marjorie Charles {the groper}, two prostitutes who “habitually work together,” according to court documents.

Working the streets, Sleuth managed to uncover the pair off duty {Ayanna Marie at left}.

Knight received a suspended sentence and 6 months’ probation after pleading guilty to Misdemeanor {Elliott?} Sexual Assault…while clever Charles remains “at large” and, no doubt, “in Charge.”

“As they were grabbing me,” said the schoolteacher victim, “it wasn’t like they were grabbing pants or anything like that.” In other words, the two hookers were hard at twerk!

The assault occurred at a downtown Shell station—still the strongest solo gas brand behind only Costco and Wal-Mart nationwide…and one of the two most popular service companies dating back to when Sleuth was a youth.

Nowadays, the price of gas has lured many smaller firms into the station business…and the competition is fierce. Culminating in September 2015 with one Kiev fueling outlet offering free fill-ups to ladies who’d pump their gas wearing only a bikini!

Gals in the Ukraine could barely restrain from getting the bargain …

… and even those in Russia who had to pay managed to make the other customers’ day!

Yet once again, America won the (right to bare) arms race…when an enterprising California company dispensed with the bikini altogether: “The station attendant had the fucking nerve to suggest I pump naked for free gas,” says this lass with the perfect ass. “He was just lucky that he said it to a girl looking for a reason to get naked in public!”

We can come up with several others

Sexy celebs are always a good reason for a ‘fappening’—the phrase “pumping gas at the self-service island” has become accepted slang for taking matters into one’s own hand—so Sleuth pays homage to National Dump the Pump Day by letting this well-known Diesel Dozen do it for us!

As Hans and Franz would chant: “It’s time to {clap} Pump You Up!

ALESSANDRA AMBROSIO -- the Victoria's Secret supermodel says, "Hands Off!"

PAMELA ANDERSON -- not the first time she's caused a 'gusher'

MEGAN FOX – that firm grip recalls her under-the-table hand job on fiancée Brian Austin Green in May 2006

SOPHIE MONK -- "No bra? No problem," this service station feels

MADONNA – pumped gas topless at a Miami station making video for her 1992 Sex book

AMANDA SEYFRIED -- the Big Love blonde has big ... 'holding' tanks!

MENA SUVARI -- clearly her 'tank' is to the rear

BRITNEY SPEARS -- doesn't always dress the 'part'

FERNANDA MARINcaliente Colombian model turned actress and TV host

PARIS HILTON – the heiress mul•tit•asking in high heels and plunging dress

JANICE DICKINSON – world’s ‘first supermodel’ is a piece of ‘work’

BROOKE BURKE

“Oh my God, my ass was everywhere!” the former Dancing with the Stars winner and fired co-host gas•ped about her beauteous gluteus from 2014 above. “It’s not when I’m all glammed up and walking out of the ballroom. It’s when I’m in the gas station in my booty shorts.”

Like during previous oil shortages, it seems like we’ve reached the END of the line.

Hope we’ve been able to fuel your imagination …