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Feeling the Need for Tweed

"He opted never to marry. I opted not to bitch about it. I'm not the jealous type." So says scorching, statuesque siren Shannon Tweed on her relationship with Kiss bassist Gene Simmons. These days, the perennial Playboy favorite is breast known as the mouthwatering mega-MILF alongside longtime love Gene on her reality show Gene Simmons: Family Jewels. However, one should never forget that although she's now retired from skinema, Shannon is a pioneer in the softcore world, her name skinonymous with the genre "erotic thriller."

This erotic, exotic thriller with the killer pegs was born to a mink farmer in Newfoundland, Canada. As luxuriously lovely and priceless as the animals she grew up around, Shannon-the third of seven children-developed an early interest in beauty pageants. She was crowed Miss Ottawa Valley in 1977 and, the following year, placed fourth overall in the Miss Canada pageant.

Hard Facts

  • Name: Shannon Tweed
  • Age: 51
  • Date of Birth: 03/10/1957
  • Nude Appearances: 38
  • Lesbian Scenes: no
  • Skinterview Mentions: 0
  • Feature Mentions:1, 2, 3, 4
  • Mr. Skin's Top Ten Mentions:1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11
  • All stats as of April 2008

The exquisitely sexy Canuck had plenty of guys trying to Mountie her, but she fled to Los Angeles to chase her dreams of stardom. Fame quickly found her after she lost her laundry on film, finding her way into the pages of Playboy as well as into the bed of Mr. Hugh Hefner himself! As Miss November 1981 and the 1982 Playmate of the Year, Shannon became one of the most popular and revered Playmates in history.

Even after her romantic relationship with Hef hit the skids, the pair remained bosom buddies. At the time, she described her dream man as "very masculine, a bit chauvinistic, definitely tall, and smells good." No mention of freakishly long oral appendages, but in 1983, Tweed found her steed when she was introduced to snake-tongued bloodspitter Simmons during a party at the Playboy mansion. That same year, she broke into the mainstream as Diana Hunter on the prime-time drama Falcon Crest. Although there wasn't any visible Falcon Chest from Shannon, her super slinky perv-formance lent this soap opera a distinctly dirty twist.

Night Eyes 3 (1993)

Fans were greedy for more Tweedy than the small screen could allow, so she graciously made her movie debut in the man vs. rat horror flick Of Unknown Origin (1983) (Picture: 1) . . . nude, naturally. And viewers didn't have to wait long for the good parts-Shan soaped up her bubbly right jubbly as the opening credits rolled. Way to start things off with a bang . . . and a boob!

Her ap-peel-ing appearance caused such a stir that Shannon decided to leave no stone unturned and no body part covered for her next skinematic outing, Hot Dog . . .The Movie (1984). She was roasting weenies left and right when she peeled off and mounted her costar's meat (Picture: 1, 2) for a hotter-than-a-bonfire tryst including boobs, butt, and bush. Skincendiary!

In 1985 Shannon joined the HBO series The Hitchhiker and really hit her stride as a performer of perfectly provocative proportions. The show was a maverick in the late-night-softcore-cable stripe of entertainment, and the gorgeous golden-haired goddess's distinct combination of dangerous sensuality and vulnerability was a perfect fit. And perfect tits were revealed when Shan departed from her silky corset. You'll have more than just a thumb sticking out for The Hitchhiker!

Powerplay (1999)

Throughout the late 1980s and early 1990s, in addition to giving birth to her two children via Gene, Nick and Sophie, Shannon diligently honed her craft of thrilling us erotically via eye-poppers such as In the Cold of the Night (1989) (Picture: 1, 2), Last Call (1990) (Picture: 1, 2), and The Firing Line (1991). Night Eyes 2 (1992), a real corker in particular, featured the nice 2 that reside on Shannon's chest as her character falls for the private dick she hires to protect her husband (Picture: 1, 2).

Her response was to one-up herself with Sexual Response (1992) that same year (Picture: 1, 2), widely regarded as one of the single greatest offerings of the softcore thriller genre. As a radio sex-show host, Shan's character has no problem dishing out advice. The only problem is that she's unable to use it for her own gains. As frigid as she is lovely to look at, our heroine meets a psychiatrist who leads her down the path of sexual self-actualization, all the while leading the audience down the path of rack-tualization. A path also studded with soft, rolling hills of sumptuous buttocks and trimmed with tufts of crotchulous Tweed weed.

Scandalous Behavior (2000)

In Indecent Behavior (1993) (Picture: 1, 2), the trend of Tweed as a sex therapist who doffs duds more often than her patients continues. And her behavior turns decadently skindecent when she starts bedding down with the cop who's investigating her after one of her clients turns up dead. Come alive-again and again and again-as the moody lighting shows off her TA at is tightest!

What's better than a naked Tweed in a movie? Two naked Tweeds! In Night Eyes 3 (1993), Shannon teamed up with her baby sister, Tracy Tweed (Picture: 1). There's something for everyone as the fair-haired Queen Shannon and the mysterious brunette Tracy hit the screen for double strip-downs that left audiences gasping. That's keeping tit in the family!

Ever blonder and even more buxom than ever, Shannon returned in Indecent Behavior II (1994) (Picture: 1), reprising her role as sex-starved carnal counselor Rebecca Mathis. She teamed up again with Night Eyes 3 (Picture: 1) director Andrew Stevens for Scorned (1994) (Picture: 1, 2). Though with Shan's non-stop, all-three-B's-baring nudity, it may as well have been called Porned!

Indecent Behavior II (1994)

Oddly enough, with a carnal career as il-LUST-trious as Ms. Tweed's, she's never done a girl-on-girl scene. But still, don't miss Human Desire (1997) (Picture: 1), which features some femme-to-femme frottage from Dawn Ann Billings (Picture: 1) and Peggy Trentini (Picture: 1) as well as the requisite pole-slammin' from naked Shannon, who remains, of course, the main course here.

As Shannon began to mature, her lusty loveliness blossomed and her body grew even more ripe and ravishing, and she never stopped revealing for even a split second. In Powerplay (1999), take in the vision of her emerging from a shower (Picture: 1), beads of moisture clinging to her Shannon cannons, and you may just make a powerplay for your zipper.

Unfortunately all nude things must cum to an end sometime. And Shannon deemed her time as the year 2000, when she made the disappointing decision to retire from the erotic fare with which her name had become synonymous. But Shannon being Shannon, she did not go quietly, opting instead for Scandalous Behavior (2000) (Picture: 1) as the final flying of the furburger flag. Its bigger budget, beauteous costars, and over-the-top sex scenes made Tweed's retirement a ceaseless barrage of bare buxomness. It also contained what is unquestionably Shannon's single greatest sex scene-one that, rumor has it, was not faked.

Something that was faked: Shan's nude scenes in Dead Sexy (2001). After that movie wrapped, she closed the door forever on her sultry celluloid past. Luckily fans can breathe in her better-than-ever beauty weekly on Family Jewels-even without Tweed's nude jewels, her interactions with her family make for must-see TV. For lust-see TV, her back catalogue of carnality is always available, though Shannon herself is quick to dismiss her enduring fame, saying, "Oh, yeah, I do movies; I forgot. They see them on TV. I forget that anybody knows me." We know you, Shannon. We know, we love, and no one could ever forget.