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“One of the world’s favorite dishes,” notes Days of the Year, “Spaghettiis more than deserving of its own little holiday.” And it just so happens to be today!!
“National Spaghetti Day on January 4 recognizes that long thin cylindrical pasta of Italian and Sicilian origin,” adds National Day Calendar. “Usually made from semolina flour, this perfect pasta has been a worldwide favorite for ages and loved by millions.”
Just how many ages? “Popular legend has it that Marco Polo introduced pasta to Italy following his exploration of China in 1271,” explains PastaFits.org. “However, we can trace pasta back as far as the 4th Century B.C., where an Etruscan tomb showed a group of natives making what appears to be pasta” (below left).
By the 1400s, it was already a staple (above right), due to its easy storage. Then sailors were able to preserve the dried pasta in ships when exploring the New World. Thomas Jefferson is credited with bringing the first “macaroni” machine to America when he returned home in 1789 after serving as Ambassador to France.
And it was when Italian starlet Sophia Loren first came to America in 1957 that the “dish” totally took off—propelled by her legendary line: “Everything you see I owe to spaghetti.”
Soon its fame—due to her frame—spread worldwide … even to Colombia, where a next generation Sofia, the equally endowed Vergara, couldn’t get enough.
That’s one spicy meat•baller.
The word “spaghetti” derives from the plural form of the Italian word spaghetto—which is a diminutive of spago, meaning “thin string” or “twine.”
The young Colombian Sofia had a bundle (above) … though few of the Italian eyefuls who grew up on the “string” could be characterized as “thin” … indeed, when the “peasant pasta” spread from the hills to high society (below left to right), the shape became wonderfully well rounded.
And spaghetti also became synonymous with sexiness … largely due to the slurping and oral implications.
Which led to a cultural craze in the late 1940s and early ’50s—with U.S. servicemen having soaked up the scene in conquered Italy—for staging “Spaghetti Eating Contests” … largely a “front” for ogling bending beauties in bathing suits!
Today’s legendary hot dog eating champ Joey Chestnut has nothing on perennial spaghetti slurping siren Geene Courtney … whom chest nuts named “Spaghetti Swooshing Queen” of 1948, below left.
Geene gained such attention for winning pasta titles that she also attracted the attention of wealthy pioneering publisher Robert Harrison (above right)—who put his lover on the cover for the first issue of his controversial Confidential magazine!
With the come-hither headline, “Showgirl Sells Shares in Self !”
Clever Courtney then hooked up with Harrison to stage “a phenomenally successful 1956 publicity stunt,” when the couple claimed the publisher “had been shot in the jungles of the Dominican Republic by a jealous rival” while hunting (below left).
According to the synopsis of a hit musical called Mr. Confidential based on their romance, Harrison “got national headlines and magazine sales soared. As part of the stunt, he brought back a supposed male potencydrug made from the vine Pega Palo”—with Geene as, essentially, the face of the first Viagra (above right)! “Marketing the product got them in trouble with legal authorities who dubbed the potion ‘obscene.’”
Into the void stepped the former Miss Denmark of 1952, Greta Thyssen … fresh off her Hollywood role as Marilyn Monroe’s body double in the film Bus Stop (1956). And her bust didn’t stop ’til she topped all challengers in a Spaghetti Eating Contest that same year (below left).
Which won her the part, in the words of IMDb, as “the original busty Pirate Girl model on the quiz show Treasure Hunt starring wolfish host Jan Murray” from 1956-58. Greta certainly had the treasure chest (above right) … “with mouth-dropping measurements of 40-24-36, she competed against the whistle-blowing likes of Jayne Mansfield.” Coming soon as Sofia Loren’s pasta-fueled rival…
And speaking of size … the Guinness World Record for ‘The Largest Bowl of Spaghetti’ was set by Buca di Beppo, a Garden Grove (Calif.) restaurant that filled a swimming pool with more than 13,780 pounds of pasta in March 2013. Considerably heavier than the stacked BBW thus inspired to fill up with her linguine lover.
More in keeping with the “thin” delicacy is “string”•bean supermodel Elettra Rossellini, daughter of Isabella {and granddaughter of Ingrid Bergman} who made quite a tasty dish for this 2009 calendar.
And it’s transparently clear how generous those genes were to her!
No doubt the love of this food fuel has been passed down from our Italian ancestors: You might be surprised to find that one quarter “of the global consumption of pasta is by Americans—the largest of any country in the world.” And in keeping with the Old World traditions, we do it beautifully:
The average American consumes 20 pounds of pasta annually—whether young fresh …
… or more seasoned.
And the United States “produces 4.4 billion pounds of pasta annually, making it the second largest pasta-producing nation,” behind only Italy—which still seems to relish its invention more.
Surely there’s something super ‘spicy’ about spaghetti … back in the ’70s model Robin Leslie and her fat fella used the food as foreplay.
And while we’re getting ‘saucy,’ who needs meat? A hot tomato or two can concoct a tempting clam sauce to complement this recent Sapphic saying: “Oh you’re straight? Well, so is spaghetti until it gets hot wet …”
The dyke duo features 2016 The Bachelor Australia star Megan Marx (at left) who refused to accept the reality romeo’s rose and walked off the show … and into the arms of ousted contestant Tiffany Scanlon (right), with whom she has “been getting very close.” As evidenced by her Instagram caption: “The spaghetti was fairly good tonight.”
It doesn’t get much better than today’s Top Ten temptresses using their noodles to full effect as they slurp and swirl this delicious jewel.
To paraphrase the 1963 children’s song to the tune of On Top of Old Smokey: “On top of spaghetti … All covered with cheese … I lost my poor meat ball” … But replaced it with ease. {What a tease ...}
SOPHIA LOREN – the patron pasta saint who told reporters upon arrival: “Everything you see I owe to spaghetti.”
Giving her measurements (above right) as “38-24-38,” the Italian import incredulously asked: “Is it true that Mansfield has two inches on me?! If so, what brand of spaghetti does she use?”
JAYNE MANSFIELD
Of the iconic image she signed for the Sleuth (above left) when Jayne tried to overshadow her at Loren’s welcome dinner on April 12, 1957, Sophia said: “Listen, look at the picture. Where are my eyes? I’m staring at her nipples because I am afraid they are about to come onto my plate.”
LADY GAGA
The gourmet cook of Italian descent specializes in grandma’s Germanotta {her real surname} Meat Balls and Spaghetti Sauce.
JENNY McCARTHY
Recently in the news for trashing Mariah Carey’s New Year’s Eve debacle in Times Square, the horny hostess seems to be wearing nothing but strands of ‘Black Spaghetti’ {a delicacy made from squid ink}.
HAYLEY MILLS – hardly a Pollyanna when it comes to Pasta
JULIA ROBERTS
Slurping in Eat Pray Love (above) … and praying her left nipple doesn’t show while making love beneath Richard Gere in Pretty Woman.
GISELE BUNDCHEN
As Tom Brady once again enters the playoffs, there’s nothing deflating about his dishy dame’s derrière!
HOLLY MADISON
Hef’s Honey from Playboy’s Girls Next Door is now carb•ing out her own niche
PADMA LAKSHMI
TV’s food ‘Hostess with the Mostest’ shows why she’s a Top Chef
EVA HERZIGOVÁ -- the Czech ‘Wonderbra’ front•woman became a jiggly jeans model. Guess? she forms the perfect END to our superior pasta•erior paean.
