Mr. Skin's DVD Pick of the Week
Funny People (2009)Blu-Ray
STUDIO: Universal
NUDE: Nydia McFadden (breasts, butt)
Judd Apatow’s feel-good comedy Funny People (2009) stars Adam Sandler as George Simmons, a comedian at the top of his game who learns he has a fatal and incurable condition decides to take a struggling young comic (Seth Rogen) under his wing. But when his disease miraculously goes into remission and gives him a new lease on life, George decides that fame is less important than trying to win back his old girlfriend (Leslie Mann). Leslie keeps her clothes on, but we do get to see the naked knockers of Nydia McFadden as she rides Adam’s handle in bed. Now that’s sexy, people!
Angel Heart (1987)Blu-Ray
STUDIO: Lions Gate
NUDE: Lisa Bonet (breasts, bush, butt), Charlotte Rampling (breasts), Elizabeth Whitcraft (breasts)
Mickey Rouke is a private dick who should be more careful about choosing his clients in Angel Heart (1987). Case in point, Louis Cyphre (say his name a couple of times real fast), played by Robert De Niro, who hires him to find Johnny Favorite. That leads to voodoo and hoodoo and not a wee bit of whoopee with occult knockout and ex-Cosby kid Lisa Bonet. Mickey loses his mind, but along the way his dick is no longer as private.
The Band (2009)
STUDIO: Breaking Glass Pictures
NUDE: Amy Cater (FFN, butt), Anthea Eaton (breasts, bush), Brianna Heart (FFN, butt)
Rock and roller Candy (Amy Cater) decides to take over as leader of her band, Gutter Filth, after her boyfriend, Jimmy (Jimstar), leaves both her and the band to go solo in the sex-filled Aussie musical comedy The Band (2009). Along with the band’s manager, Jennifer (Anthea Eaton), Candy leads Gutter Filth to career heights that surpass Jimmy’s. But more importantly, the two women discover they have something besides music in common, namely a mutual love of muff-diving. The movie is filled with naked women and explicit hardcore sex, lesbian and otherwise. Whatever your pleasure is, your gland will love The Band.
Brno (2009)
STUDIO: Universal
NUDE: Michelle McLaren (FFN, butt)
Borat mastermind Sacha Baron Cohen takes his gay Austrian fashion correspondent alter ego on the road in the semi-scripted comedy Brno (2009). After attempting to seduce 2008 presidential candidate Ron Paul, making a television pilot, adopting an African baby, and going on a hunting trip, Brno tries his hand at being straight and goes to a swinger’s party, where he’s flogged by naked dominatrix Michelle McLaren. While Brno’s running from the whip, your eyes will be glued to Michelle’s boobs, butt, and pno.
Cheerleaders’ Wild Weekend (1979)
STUDIO: Scorpion Entertainment (1979)
NUDE: Elizabeth Halsey (breasts), Marilyn Joi (breasts), Lenka Novak (breasts, butt), Janie Squire (breasts, butt), Wally Ann Wharton (breasts, butt)
Even the best of good girls have their wicked side, which accounts for the phenomenon of pink-cheeked co-eds brimming over with school spirit all during the week but just waiting for Friday so they can sneak off on a Cheerleaders’ Wild Weekend (1979). Unfortunately a lesbian-led group of terrorists has alternate plans for the trio of Wild Weekend pom-pom shakers, kidnapping the nubile and buoyant young ladies and locking them up in a remote hideaway where the girls are enticed to display their gravity-defying breasts and high-reaching rears to pass the time while awaiting ransom payment. If God is good, the money may never come.
Life on Mars: Series 2
STUDIO: Acron Media
NUDE: Kelly Wenham
In the British cop-centered sci-fi drama Life on Mars, Sam Tyler (John Simm) wakes up after a car wreck to find himself transported thirty years backward in time into the year 1973. Once in the past, he joins the police squad and starts working on a case that somehow seems related to the one he was working on in 2003 before the car accident. The show was later developed for American network TV, but the nudity in the UK original was left out, which might explain the Stateside version's early demise.
A Secret Affair (1999)
STUDIO: Vanguard
NUDE: Janine Turner (breasts)
Northern Exposure star Janine Turner is a real turner-on in the intercontinental love story A Secret Affair (1999). Janine plays American businesswoman Vanessa Stewart, who travels to Venice on a buying trip, where she meets Irish TV reporter Bill Fitzgerald (Paudge Behan). Romantic sparks immediately fly, and Vanessa is moved to break her wedding engagement in order to relocate to the Emerald Isle and work as an artist. Unfortunately her new boyfriend gets kidnapped. From there, the story twists, turns, and flirts with tragedy, but Janine is never less than entirely alluring. Her appeal is no secret.
Sex Is Zero (2002)
STUDIO: Synapse
NUDE: So-Won Ham (breasts), Jae-yeong Jin (breasts, butt), Yi Shin (breasts, butt), Si-hu Yun (breasts)
Korea is fast becoming the Hollywood of the Far East, though they've got some catching up to do. For instance, Sex Is Zero (2002) is a sex comedy almost two decades after the dominance of that genre in the American marketplace. But then is that really a critique? Not when such Asian arousers as So-Won Ham, Jae-yeong Jin, Lee Shin, and Si-hu Yun star as college students who must attend the School of Hard Knockers. Each flashes her egg rolls (yes, that's a Chinese dish, but you get the point . . . in your pants) and look delicious doing it. Viewers will want to do them, so if these girls don't deliver, book passage to Korea and get in on the fun.
The Sopranos: Season 1Blu-Ray
STUDIO: HBO
NUDE: Lisa Arning (butt), Veronica Bero (breasts), Siberia M. Federico (breasts, bush, butt), Desiree Kehoe (breasts), Theresa Lynn (breasts), Bernadette Penotti (breasts)
After watching The Sopranos, viewers will never think of whacking the same. Forget about putting a bullet in the back of someone’s brain, the only killing audiences will be doing after watching this critically lauded HBO series is murdering off their sperm. That’s because this family stays together by laying together! James Gandolfini plays the big boss man of a New Jersey Mafia family, which causes him such anxiety that he needs to regularly visit a head shrink, played by little-head-growing beauty Lorraine Bracco. The show has come to redefine TV, not only because of its level of high quality but also its high-quality ass. While Tony’s wife (Edie Falco) and daughter (Jamie-Lynn Sigler) are rarely if ever skinful, capo di capo likes his prostitutes Russian, like up-turned titty bitty Oksana Babiy. And she’s always rushing to take off her top. It’s amazing that any family business ever gets done with all the screwing that's going on. Gandolfini may go to a head shrink to try to figure out his neurosis, but his life is a head grower in the pants!
Three Monkeys (2008)
STUDIO: Zeitgeist Films
NUDE: Hatice Aslan (breasts)
Servet (Ercan Kesal) is a politician whose life changes in an instant when he falls asleep at the wheel and kills a pedestrian in the award-winning Turkish drama Three Monkeys (2008). Desperate to avoid scandal, he pays off his driver, Eyup (Yavuz Bingol), to take the rap. After Eyup agrees to take the blame and serve a short prison sentence in exchange for a lot of money, his wife, Hacer (Hatice Aslan), begins having an affair with the politician. And Hatice isn’t monkeying around! In one scene she wears some see-through lingerie before her husband pulls it off of her and exposes her boobs. Check out those Turkish delights!
Toi et moi (2006)
STUDIO: Koch
NUDE: Marion Cotillard (breasts)
Julie Depardieu works for a magazine called You and Meor, if you'd like, Toi et moi (2006)writing word balloons for romantic photo stories about longing, love, and the joy of finding Mr. Moneybags. Her work colors her view of relationships, and her real-life relationships often invade her work. Some of the main characters in her real-world romance are bang-up businessman Tomer Sisley and Spanish mason Sergio Peris Mencheta, who wants to steal her away from Tomer, her perpetual Mr. Wrong. Meanwhile, Julie's musician half-sis (Marion Cotillard) is juggling her own romances . . . and also baring her jugs! See this Oscar winner's award-winning dinner plates on display as she lounges in the tub, and don't forget to polish your statue a time or two in her honor.
The Vengeance Trilogy: Lady Vengeance (2005)
STUDIO: Palisades Tartan
NUDE: Mi-Ran Ra (bush, butt)
In the clever revenge fantasy come to life Lady Vengeance (2005), a young woman, Lee, is tricked into abducting a young girl on behalf of a shady older man. When she is finally apprehended by the police, Lee is sent to prison for more than a decade. While there, she makes good use of her time by becoming friends with all of the inmates. Upon her release, she turns to these friends and seeks revenge on the sinister older man who betrayed her in the first place. Check out Mi-Ran Ra’s booty as she eats at the clam shack, the one located by the side of the pool.
The Vengeance Trilogy: Oldboy (2003)
STUDIO: Palisades Tartan
NUDE: Hye-jeong Kang (breasts, butt), Jin-seo Yun (breasts)
Life has a way of ensuring that no sin goes unpunished, even if an evildoer is made to orchestrate his own damnation. A study in vengeance, penance, and the human psyche’s infinite capacity for self-abasement, Korean-filmed Oldboy (2004) brings the violence of a conflicted soul to the screen in a progression of brutal tableaux. A man has been kidnapped and held prisoner for fifteen years in a single hotel room. Upon his release, he is finely attired, richly funded, and given notification that if he fails to locate his kidnapper within five days, his true suffering will begin. Teeth are ripped from a wailing victim’s mouth, blood packs splatter, bones crunch. What hope is there to solve this deadly mystery when the villain’s identity has been hidden even from himself?
The Vengeance Trilogy: Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance (2002)
STUDIO: Palisades Tartan
NUDE: Du-na Bae (breasts, butt)
Ryu’s (Ha-kyun Shin) life couldn’t possibly get any worse in Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance (2002): He was born deaf, his sister needs a kidney transplant, and his boss just laid him off. Ryu and his girlfriend (Du-na Bae) cook up a scheme to raise cash and get back at his former boss by kidnapping his daughter, but the situation spirals downward into a sea of violence and brutality. Du-na bares her breasts to ride her green-haired paramour in this bizarre Korean thriller.
Watch Out (2008)
STUDIO: Breaking Glass Pictures
NUDE: Jillian Lauren Dreskin (breasts)
Based on the novel by Joseph Suglia, Watch Out (2008) stars Matt Riddlehoover as Professor Jonathan Barrows, a man whose consuming narcissism leads him to make a blow-up doll of himself so that he can finally have sex. Shot in a guerrilla style with no permits and the actors doubling as crew, Watch Out features plenty of bizarre behavior, an actual ejaculation scene, and the bare boobs of Jillian Lauren Dreskin. Now that’s something to watch out for!
