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Celebrity Porn-Alikes: Part One

Thu, Mar 19, 2009 @ 7:00am by Sleuth (27 Comments)

Mr Skin joins forces with Celebrity Sleuth to present a side-by-side skinalysis comparing the hottest Hollywood starlets with the sexiest porn sirens of the 1970s and ’80s (plus a few contemporary XXX queens). You will be T&Amazed!

Be sure to come back tomorrow for PART TWO!
Celebrity Sleuth Header

1) Kay Parker = Mimi Rogers

At 64, Kay’s now a “metaphysical counselor”; she and the 52-year-old ex-Mrs. Tom Cruise share a meta physique.

Kay Parker and Mimi Rogers

2) Lisa De Leeuw = Emma Stone

The first “Golden Age” star to die of AIDS succumbed nearly five years to the day after the Superbad freckled fox was born.

Lisa DeLeeuw and Emma Stone

3) Sharon Kelly = Lindsay Lohan

Sharon's real name is Colleen Brennan, and Irish Catholic Lindsay is a similarly freckled "colleen" with a red-handed rack.

Sharon Kelly and Lindsay Lohan

4) Annette Haven = Anne Hathaway

Not only do they share initials, but they also share raven hair, porcelain skin, ruby red lips . . . and nips, atop backbreaking mountains.

Annette Haven and Anne Hathaway

5) Carol Connors = Thora Birch

Carol was the amazing-areolaed nurse in Deep Throat; her daughter Thora could’ve nursed a nation in American Beauty.

Carol Connors and Thora Birch

6) Christy Canyon = Kim Kardashian

Alliterative names and awe-inspiring frames are TWO of the things these 36DD brunettes of Armenian heritage share . . . with us!

Christy Canyon and Kim Kardashian

7) Sharon Mitchell = Rachel Griffiths

Sharon keeps pornsters alive by testing for AIDS through AIM; Rachel had ’em coming & going in Six Feet Under.

Sharon Mitchell and Rachel Griffiths

8) Traci Lords = Scarlett Johansson

Things got Lost in Translation (e.g., Traci’s birth certificate); none needed for the Girl with a Pearl Earring (or necklace).

Traci Lords and Scarlett Johansson

9) Marilyn Chambers = Kristin Cavallari

The “Ivory Snow Girl” went Behind the Green Door, while golden girl Kristin went from Laguna Beach to Green Flash.

Marilyn Chambers and Kristin Cavallari

10) Kristine DeBell = Kristen Bell

Besides the nearly identical names (and frames), each starred in children’s classics: Alice in Wonderland and The Wizard of Oz.

Kristine DeBell and Kristen Bell

11) Savannah = Paris Hilton

The Suicide Blonde and the heir-head shared a love of partying and dating: guys (both Pauly Shore) and gals!

Savannah and Paris Hilton

12) Jeanna Fine = Rose Byrne

The end of Jeanna’s lesbian love affair with Savannah helped bring on the latter’s suicide; Rose recently starred in Just Buried.

Jeanna Fine and Rose Byrne

13) Heather Hunter = Megalyn Echikunwoke

Megalyn survived 24 to become the coroner on CSI: Miami, while hued-nude Hunter continues to knock ’em dead in rap.

Heather Hunter and Megalyn Echikunwoke

14) Annie Sprinkle = Sara Rue

A pair of naturally stacked Jewesses (born Ellen Steinberg and Sara Schlackman), together they could nurse the globe.

Annie Sprinkle and Sara Rue

15) Ashlyn Gere = Kim Delaney

Born less than ten months apart, Ashlyn’s real first name is Kim, yet NYPD was never as Blue as Get It In Gere!

Ashlyn Gere and Kim Delaney

16) Bambi Woods = Blake Lively

Gossip was that Bambi died of a drug overdose in 1986, but she’s alive and well and living in Cali near Gossip Girl Blake.

Bambi Woods and Blake Lively

17) Rene Bond = Michele Tafoya

Two California Girls with tempting lips, Rene died in 1996 of cirrhosis; if only ESPN reporter Michele’s sideline was porn!

Rene Bond and Michelle Tafoya

18) Ginger Lynn = Heidi Montag

The first Vivid Girl, Ginger starred in Beverly Hills Cocks; Heidi swears she didn’t leak Lauren Conrad’s Hills sex tape.

Ginger Lynn and Heidi Montag

19) Candida Royale = Christina Ricci

Pint-sized brunettes who share initials, brains, feminism, and natural breasts . . . they are anything but The Opposite of Sex!

Candida Royalle and Christina Ricci

20) Felecia = Vanessa Hudgens

They share Native American-Latina blood . . . and a fondness for tanlines. Felecia only did girl-girl; Vanessa’s debut single is "V".

Felecia and Vanessa Hudgens

Remember, that's just Part 1 of Celebrity Sleuth's Celebrity Porn-Alikes! Come back tomorrow to see Britney Spears, Katie Holmes, Alyssa Milano, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Ali Larter, and the hardcore XXX fuck stars they most nakedly resemble. You will be T&Amazed all over again (and all over yourself)!

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how can you even think of putting kim kardashian up next to one of the best looking women to walk this earth christy canyon. christy did and still does have the best tits ever plus her beauty is like none other.nice try guys but maybe rethink this one.

rob @ 6:21PM on February 14, 2012

This comment was deleted by the administrator.

Slavic08 @11:21AM on December 26, 2011

i have a best choices for #20 vanessa hudgen than yours... it's not felecia, but ABELLA ANDERSONS!! check if you wanna believe me!

ooo @ 2:34PM on November 3, 2011

actually mariska hargitay looks dead on to Janine Lindemulder

kavie @ 5:22PM on October 20, 2011

Savanna Samson and Michelle Beadle

Adam @11:41PM on June 20, 2011
view more comments (27 total)

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