Mr. Skin Mr. Skin

In Arapaho, Oklahoma this week, authorities arrested Custer County Sheriff Mike Burgess for a long list of crimes including forcing 12 female inmates at the county jail to compete in a wet t-shirt contest with cigarettes as the prize, having sex with a woman in his custody, making another inmate a trustee after she gave him a blowjob, 14 counts of second-degree rape, and seven counts of forcible oral sodomy. From the looks of things, first-class sleazebag Burgess was running a hellhole not unlike the grimy pits of skin and sex that are featured in some of the classic Women in Prison films we love so much. In Bad Girls Dormitory (1984), the inmates also have to deal with a sadistic and corrupt warden who forces them to wear white t-shirts that reveal the outlines of their hard-nippled knockers. Eerily similar. Likewise, Chained Heat (1983), a movie that features the formidable funbags of femmes fatale Linda Blair and Sybil Danning, features John Vernon as Warden Bacman, a dirty old man who makes a practice of sticking it to his inmates in his private hot tub. One of my all-time favorite rack-tresses, Rainbeaux Smith, appears in another great WIP flick, Caged Heat (1974), directed by Jonathan Demme and produced by Roger Corman. This time the inmates' persecutor is a wheelchair-bound lesbian played by Barbara Steele, but her tactics of intimidation are just as brutal as any man's. Maybe if Sheriff Burgess had watched some of these movies, he would have known that the slimeballs running the women's jails always get theirs in the end.